The Daily Tonic: “Are You A Roadie?”

We get it. Writing a will’s probably the last thing on your mind. But unless you want someone else divvying up your kids or assets, you likely need one. Beyond can help you sort it in just 15 minutes from the comfort of your sofa. Just £90 and easy to update as life changes, Popbitch readers get 25% off with code POPBITCH25

[At Beyond]

A quick dose of gossip, smut and silliness Subscribe

* Unlucky in love in Leeds

* In court with Freddie

* PLUS: A brand new audio round

>> Jim’ll nix it <<

Savile keeps his distance

When we asked you to tell us about the celebrities that you’d written to as kids, we were expecting one name in particular to crop up. Sure enough, it did. It seems a lot of Popbitch readers once reached out to Sir Jimmy Savile. Luckily, he appears to have ignored every last one of you…
SW writes:

“When I was about 10 I wrote to Jimmy Savile asking to dance the Locomotion with Kylie. He didn’t respond which I’m pissed off about and relieved in equal measure.”
C writes:

“Back in the day when I was a naive aspiring bedroom pop star I wrote to Jim’ll Fix It desperately wanting to meet Suzi Quatro. He didn’t reply and I was gutted but I feel I dodged a bullet on that one.”
LM writes:

“Always a slightly odd child, I had a massive crush on Orville as a nipper. The first record I ever bought was ‘I Wish I Could Fly’ on 7″. Even wrote to Jim’ll Fix It asking to meet the little green fella. Never got a reply. Probably for the best.”

In a rather unfortunate double whammy, SW (who wrote to Jim about Kylie) was also a member of Rolf’s Cartoon Club…

>> A&E-List <<

Question of the day

Thanks for all your stories of accidentally turning down celebrities. Now we want to hear your stories of accidentally tripping them up.
Today’s Question: Have you ever inadvertently injured a celeb?
Tell us your tales of accidents and emergencies with the stars and we’ll dish out some digital goodies to our favourites: hello@popbitch.com

Nominative Determinism of the Day: As the debate over Oxford’s Cecil Rhodes statue is reignited, the BBC reporter covering the story… Michael Race!

>> Dance / off <<

Just not got the moves

EW writes:

“When I was at Leeds University I used to work on the bar at an R’n’B club and loads of Leeds United FC players used to come in. One night I was asked for my number by a really tall, gangly-looking guy. I said no because he couldn’t dance.
“It was Rio Ferdinand. Gutted.”

NMD writes: “I was at Leeds Festival in 2000, backstage at the bar. My bf at the time was in the toilets and some guy came up asking if I wanted to see his tour bus. Told him to fuck off and said ‘Are you a roadie?’ Turned out he was the singer from Slipknot.”

>> Sweet child decline <<

A bed of Guns N’Roses

purple_lizzie writes:

“Some friends and I went to a gig at the Town and Country Club in Kentish Town. We’d gone to see the support band, so spent the main act in the bar and got chatting to some interesting looking Americans. They were in a band and in the UK to play at the Marquee, but none of us had ever heard of them.
“One of them with impressive hair invited my friend back to their hotel, but she said no thanks. They were Guns N’Roses and hair guy was Slash; they got super huge about 18 months later.”

There was a time in the 90s when Axl Rose was told by an LA astrologer that Slash was a ‘psychic vampire’ who had sucked all the creativity out of him, so he refused to be in the same building as the guitarist.

>> Queen’s club <<

In court with Freddie

PL writes:

“In 1976 or 1977, I was on a school trip to Wimbledon. In those days you could get into the grounds on a day ticket and see any of the outside courts and queue for limited viewing on the main courts. Some mates and I decided to wait for the VIPs to get bored and, as they left court, ask for their tickets.
“A scruffy, goofy-looking chap came down the stairs and some people around us started calling out and pushing. In doing so, I was pushed into said scruff to which he said ‘Hello, young man. Would you like my autograph?’
“I replied, ‘No, but can I have your ticket?’
“Which Freddie Mercury duly gave me.”

Who gives better gifts than Sharon Stone? When Tim Burton’s Batman wrapped, Jack Nicholson had leather jackets made up with both Batman and Joker patches for the crew.

>> Quarantunes <<

Matters of state

Today’s audio round has a theme. We won’t tell you what it is, but knowing that there is one might help you to figure out some of the trickier songs.
You get a point for each title, a point for each artist and – because they have no real-world value – why not give yourself an extra point if you get the theme?
[Listen to it here]

POPBITCH POPQUIZZES: If you want to play the full Popbitch Popquiz while we wait for the world to return to normal, we put together a bunch of editions for you to download and play in the comfort of your own home.

[Have a browse here]

>> Hmmms <<

A couple of quick things

Make paper versions of your old computers

[Tech origami]
Eight cello arrangement of Knight Rider

[Listen on YouTube]
York Press’s Massive Food desk is as busy as ever…

[Bad news this week though]

Thanks to: SW, C, LM, HD, EW, NMD, purple_lizzie, PL, grannysuckseggs, J

Old Jokes Home

How does a male farmer win the heart of a female farmer?

Attract her.

Fancy Another?