The Daily Tonic: At It Like Rarebits

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A quick dose of gossip, smut and silliness Subscribe

* BVs for Gorky’s Zygotic Mynci

* Shirley Bassey: Secret Agent

* PLUS: A Welsh audio round…

>> Mantel behaviour <<

How to make it in Hollywood

While we were looking for stories about Welsh legends for today’s issue, one that cropped up was this one about Catherine Zeta Jones’s former fiancé, Hollywood producer Jon Peters.
He’s not Welsh, but we felt he deserved a quick mention for the gift he’s given to the world of modern celebrity – as Peters invented the practice of “mantelpiecing”.
In a business where everyone is keen to slip you their card, Peters decided to go one better. He used to carry small framed pictures of himself which he would take to Hollywood house parties. Then, when no-one was looking, he’d quietly place one on the host’s mantelpiece alongside their nearest and dearest so that they’d have a reminder of him every day.

Strangest email subject line of the day: “Joe Pasquale Launches New Horror Collection Written and Inspired By The Lockdown”

>> Calling cards <<

Question of the day

In honour of Jon Peters slipping his headshot onto strangers’ mantelpieces, we want to know what other schmoozing tricks celebrities use to make themselves stick in the mind of people they’re trying to dazzle.
Who has a pretentious business card? Who pretends to have a personal assistant? Who has a farewell line designed to linger in the memory?
Today’s Question: What is the strangest/saddest/most audacious celebrity networking trick you’ve ever seen pulled?
Tell us stories to hello@popbitch.com and we’ll send a digital goody bag to the best of them.

Huw Edwards is known by some BBC staff as “the dating fairy” as he likes setting up single BBC staff members on dates together.

>> What’s new p****c**? <<

The blue, blue air of Tom

A writes:

“Back in the 90s I worked at a gastro pub in West London heavily frequented by music industry types. One Saturday night we had a call from one of the regular music industry peeps asking us to keep the pub open as they were bringing a VIP guest.
“At about 11pm the Stereophonics turned up with Tom Jones. They were really polite and lovely – Tom even sang to some middle aged pissed women who spotted him – but I have never, ever heard language like it. Every other word was fuck, cunt, twat etc.
“They stayed until 2am, by which time we had to ask them to leave as we’d been serving them booze illegally for two hours.”

The Super Furry Animals single Juxtapozed With U was originally supposed to be a duet with Brian Harvey from East 17, but Bri turned them down. So did Bobby Brown. So Gruff sang it to himself instead.

>> At it like rarebits <<

Shagging Welsh rock royalty

pilchardboy writes: 

“Richard James from Gorky’s Zygotic Mynci once turned up to our house party in Cardiff and tried to snog my other half. When she rebuffed him, he looked shocked and said ‘You do know I’m in Gorky’s right? I could get you on the next album on backing vocals.’ She laughed for so long he left.”
slackhack writes:

“Someone I know shagged James Dean Bradfield and her flat was less than spotless. When she woke up, he’d been to the shop, bought croissants and orange juice, done the washing up and was cleaning her lounge.”
Rick_Gassko writes:

“Just after he got booted out of the Stereophonics, Stuart Cable and I got twatted in a room in the K-West hotel in London. We sat up all night doing lines together and then I had to sit there twitching while he drilled two groupies senseless. His rhythm wasn’t up to much but, to his credit, he did keep grinning and making high-five motions at me throughout.”

Lisa Scott-Lee earned the nickname “Brown Eyed Girl” in the early days of Steps because she had a habit of mooning the rest of the band.

>> Shirley not? <<

The spy who loved me

There was a podcast series out recently called Wind Of Change, which tried to get to the bottom of a rumour that the CIA wrote the Scorpions’ song Wind Of Change as a way to bring about the collapse of the Soviet Union.
A similar sort of rumour exists about Dame Shirley Bassey. There’s chatter in some spy circles that suggests that Shirley Bassey became an asset for Interpol in the early 1980s – back when she was palling about with Middle Eastern royalty and singing Happy Birthday for Saudi billionaire Adnan Khashoggi.
The story goes that, as these men would casually impart insider information to her in order to impress her, she supposedly came into a lot of extremely useful intel. One even suggests she was essential in helping pinpoint Saddam Hussein’s palaces in Iraq.

When Lembit Öpik was MP for Montgomeryshire, he had the number one high score on his local pub’s pinball machine. His 3 letter name on the scoreboard read ‘LEM’.

>> Quarantunes <<

#159: Wales Song

Today’s ten tracks are all from Welsh acts. You get one point for naming each of the artists/bands, and one point for naming each of the songs.
A maximum of twenty points on offer – all as functionally worthless as each other.
[Play it here]

Join us as we try out a safe, socially-distanced quiz this Wednesday at The Court in Soho with our host Tom Webb. Book a space and someone from their team will contact you to confirm. There’s a deposit of £10pp, which you can redeem against your bill on the night. 7:30pm, Weds 28th Oct.

[Find out more and book here]

>> Hmmms <<

A couple of quick things

The house from Fast Times At Ridgemont High is up for sale

[Take a look]
The finalists for the Comedy Wildlife Photos 2020 are here

[A great sea turtle in there]
Capybaras v Jack-O-Lantern

[Watch on YouTube]

Thank to: A, pilchardboy, slackhack, rick_gassko, SC, DM, TP, PD
PS: We’re still looking for stories about Merseyside, Lancashire and South Yorkshire legends – so if you have any favourite tales about the stars who hail from there hello@popbitch.com

Old Jokes Home

Ryan Giggs is prone to homesickness.

He loves Salford, but does Miss Wales occasionally.

Fancy Another?