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Issue 820 – Operation Yewnnopoulos

 An Evening of Radical Thinking –
 the case for free money, a 15-hour
 working week, and more. An evening
 with one of Europe's top young
 thinkers exploring visionary ideas,
 like how the Universal Basic Income
 could be the antidote to inequality
 and unhappiness. Rutger Bregman,
 Tues 7 March, London SW1 6.45pm.
 10% off, with code POPBITCH:
 "I'd always want sausage rather
 than fish" - Tom Daley
 POPBITCH           _     _ _       _
  _ __   ___  _ __ | |__ (_) |_ ___| |__
 | '_ \ / _ \| '_ \| '_ \| | __/ __| '_ \
 | |_) | (_) | |_) | |_) | | || (__| | | |
 | .__/ \___/| .__/|_.__/|_|\__\___|_| |_|
 |_|         |_| 22.02.17 ISSUE 820
 Free email every week
 Email stories
 * Sweden's Saturday Swearfest
 * Pet Shop Boys remixed by NME
 * Charts: Ed Sheeran still No. 1
      >> Sky and retiring <<
      Another news cycle for Brad
    Once Britain's favourite
    sportsman, Bradley Wiggins'
    reputation has taken a bit
    of a dent since we learned
    about those TUEs, the mystery
    jiffy bag and the aborted
    appearance on downmarket
    reality show, The Jump.
    Thankfully it isn't stopping
    him from landing some primo
    gigs. Just before Christmas,
    Google booked out all of
    Soho Farm House for their
    top execs – and invited
    Bradley to join them.
    To teach a spin-class.
 Did Caroline Flack make it to the
 Brits last night? Last we saw, she
 was wandering around Canary Wharf
 asking for directions to the O2.
      >> A star is born <<
      Pet Shop Boys get NME remix
    When Pet Shop Boys released
    their latest album, Super, it
    got a tiny 27-word write up in
    the NME. The mediocre 3 star
    review told us little more
    than the album "confirms their
    love of pop anthems".
    Which wasn't that surprising.
    PSB were never really a band
    associated with the NME.
    Then, in February, it was
    announced they'd be turning
    up at the NME Awards to get
    a "Godlike Genius" award.
    NME's website encouraged us
    to "revisit our review of
    their latest album, Super".
    Which now has 348 words.
    And 4 stars.
 Tiger Woods sometimes checks into
 hotels as Logan Howlett, the human
 name of comic-book hero Wolverine.
      >> Big Questions <<
      What people are asking?
    Which Game of Thrones cast
    members have let fame go to their
    heads so far that they demanded
    500 grand each for a two-day
    advertising shoot this month?
    Unsurprisingly, the brand
    decided to pass and recast.
 America's Conservative Action
 Conference may have rejected Milo
 but the talk "If Heaven Has A Gate,
 A Wall And Extreme Vetting, Why
 Can't America?" is still on.
      >> Service charge <<
      Gordon's high stakes gamble
    Popbitch readers may remember
    the old CEO of Gordon Ramsay's
    restaurants (his father-in-law,
    Chris Hutcheson). He was the
    one who took a superinjunction
    out against us to stop us from
    making jokes about his secret
    second family.
    Looks like we haven't heard
    the last of him, as Hutcheson
    and three of his children are
    up in court next month – for
    allegedly hacking Gordon's
    We can't imagine the case is
    going to be too pretty. The
    two of them were practically
    joined at the hip back in the
    day, so Chris knows pretty
    much everything about Gordon.
    The two of them used to go on
    "fact-finding" trips around
    the world together. Colleagues
    remember hearing stories about
    the "exceptional service" the
    two men enjoyed from staff on
    their long-haul flights – and
    that's just the PG gossip they
    were happy to talk about
    around the office.
 FYI: Spare a thought for David
 Beckham. Another one of his best
 mates with hacked emails! Still,
 probably nothing to worry about,
 eh Dave?
 The NYPD has revised the costs of
 securing Trump Tower and the Trumps
 down to just $50-60m in 2017.
      >> F for effort <<
      Sweden's Saturday swearfest
    Donald Trump was shocked at
    what was happening last week
    in Sweden – and he wasn't the
    only one. Melodifestivalen, the
    family-friendly contest to pick
    the Swedish Eurovision entry,
    has become a filthy swearfest!
    40% of Sweden tuned in to watch
    what the hosts decided to call
    "Melodifuckenfestivalen". Live
    on stage. On prime time TV.
    As for the songs, Lisa Ajax
    entered "I Don't Give A...
    (Fuck)", and Robin Bengtssen's
    lyrics featured no fewer than
    nine fuckings.
    You'll be glad to know that
    the favourite to win isn't
    a potty-mouth. He's called
    Nano Omar, spent his teen
    years in a foster home and
    ended up in prison.
    Fox News will be pleased!
 Popbitch's favourite Stockholm
 restaurant? Rolfs Kok. (Did you
 see what we did there?)
      >> Black and white <<
      Brit Award mathematics
    The Brit Awards have been
    criticised for failing to
    reflect the diversity in
    the UK's music scene.
    Four of the five nominees for
    Best Male Artist were black.
    So they give it to the one
    white guy. Even though he's
    been dead for the whole year.
    Nice work!
 Today's headlines: "Sony Music
 dominate BRIT Awards". Totally
 coincidentally, the new boss of
 the Awards also runs Sony Music!
      >> Tennant's extra <<
      Portrait of the artist
    The poster for David Tennant's
    new West End play Don Juan in
    Soho might look familiar. That's
    because, despite the production
    holding a high-end professional
    shoot, the photo on the poster
    is an old one. It was taken six
    years ago and has since been
    published in dozens of magazine
    articles, used as the promo pic
    for a number of previous work
    projects, and serves as his
    Spotlight portrait photo too.
    Why does everyone seem so keen
    to use it? If you ever hire
    Tennant, you'll find out.
    Producers are gently encouraged
    to use the photo – which was
    taken by one Georgia Moffett,
    a.k.a. Mrs Tennant.
 Hot new drink in London bars: the
 "Craig David". A shot of tequila
 with a shot of pineapple juice.
 (Apparently it's Craig's favourite)
      >> French toast <<
      Applauding Benzema
    Sex-tape blackmail, hiring
    an underage prostitute,
    driving bans for speeding:
    whenever Karim Benzema makes
    the press, it's usually for
    less-than-wholesome reasons.
    So when his name showed up in
    Football Leaks for his finances
    no-one was all that surprised.
    Until they saw why.
    It turns out Benzema refused
    Real Madrid's usual tax lawyers.
    He didn't set up his image
    rights company offshore so he
    could pay only 5% tax, like
    most of his foreign peers (i.e.
    using the Beckham Law). Instead
    he set up a company in his home
    town of Lyon, France. Where
    company tax is 33%.
 Rag'n'Bone Man is from Uckfield,
 East Sussex. Formerly famous as the
 last place Lord Lucan was seen.
      >> Pissy Paws 4 <<
      Elm's got Wallis disease
 TM writes:
    "I was in the gents nearest
    BBC Radio London's studio.
    Robert Elms entered and not
    only did he not wash his
    hands after, he spat in the
    urinal before weeing."
 Vintage Hollywood pissy-paws?
 Champion swimmer Esther Williams.
 How ironic.
      >> Brotherly love <<
      Neymar's criminal behaviour
    Barcelona's on-pitch collapse
    isn't their only bad news this
    month. Neymar's just lost his
    appeal over corruption charges
    and will have to stand trial.
    If found guilty he's likely
    to get a two-year sentence,
    but he won't go to jail (in
    Spain first offenders get
    any sentence up to two
    years suspended).
    This might change, however,
    if the judge catches sight of
    his tattoos. Neymar has a huge
    inking of his sister's face
    on his arm. (And she has a
    matching one of his eyes.)
    Which is surely criminal.
 Neymar case explained:
 Listen to this week's Media Focus
 podcast, with Caroline Norbury,
 CEO of Creative England:
      >> Hmmms <<
      Cats, Trumps, tractors
    Draw a cat by hand and
    this program creates it:
    Tiny Trumps:
    Some interesting Brexit
    analysis by Prof Curtice:
    Pornhub comments on
    stock photos:
    Local news of the week:
    Issue 32 of Popbitch
    Magazine is out tomorrow;
    last call for Issue 31:
 Thanks to: VB, PD, Craves, B89,
 NB, party_b, monstris, TP, TW, A,
 GO, SM,
 Old Jokes Home:
 Q: What do you call a North
 Korean assassin?
 A: Kim Ree-Per.
 Still Bored?
 Stevie Wonder advertising Atari:

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