Harry Potter and the Beanie Baby
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********************************************* Andy Murray 4-1 to win Wimbledon. It could be his year - andymurrayometer.com says he is currently 87% British! Worth a flutter... http://bit.ly/L2wFQ0 ********************************************* "I'm sick of girls who don't know how to high-five" - Aaron Sorkin ---------------------------------------------- POPBITCH _ _ _ _ _ __ ___ _ __ | |__ (_) |_ ___| |__ | '_ \ / _ \| '_ \| '_ \| | __/ __| '_ \ | |_) | (_) | |_) | |_) | | || (__| | | | | .__/ \___/| .__/|_.__/|_|\__\___|_| |_| |_| |_| 05.07.12 ISSUE 601 Free every week: to subscribe/unsubscribe go to http://www.popbitch.com Send us stories - email: hello@popbitch.com * Julian Assange's birthday bash * Killer poppies land in London * Charts: Maroon 5 are number one ----------------------------------------------- >> Under the thumb << Kanye and the godfather Kanye West has got himself a new management consultant - Irving Azoff. Would that be the same Irving Azoff who was recently named the most powerful man in the music industry and just so happens to be godfather to Kanye's current-yet-somehow-implausible squeeze Kim Kardashian? Why, yes! The very chap! ------------------------------------------------ Press release for the Jeremy Deller launch this week: "7.00pm - 8.30pm Sussex Wildlife Trust are bringing a live bat". ------------------------------------------------ >> Paedo pap << Scientologists take no chances A LA paparazzo tells of the time they were assigned to do a job outside the Church of Scientology Celebrity Centre. They were sitting in their car, in the busy street outside, when a girl came out of the centre with a bunch of leaflets in her hand. She walked up and down the street putting a leaflet on every windscreen. Finally she got to the pap's car, slapped one on his car and went back inside. He jumped out and read the leaflet. It was a photo of him, with a reference to him being a paedophile. In a panic he ran up the street, ripping them off every car... only to find that - except for the one on his car - they were all completely blank. He considered himself warned off. ------------------------------------------------ Barclays' ex-COO, Jerry Del Missier, has a tattoo of his dog on his shoulder. ------------------------------------------------ >> Big Questions << What people are asking this week Which former premier league star got so drunk at a Marbella beach club that he let his mates strip him naked and throw him in the pool, where one of them pretended to suck his rather small cock? ------------------------------------------------ Julianne Hough sent Daniel Radcliffe a love- letter and beanie baby on Valentine's Day, when an extra in Harry Potter and Sorcerer's Stone. ------------------------------------------------ >> It's my party... << ...and I'll hide if I want to TV networks from around the world have been bidding for an exclusive interview with Julian Assange, at home in the Ecuadorian embassy. This was supposed to have been finalised early this week. When one of the bidders called to find out what had happened, they were told by an embassy worker that they'd not been forgotten but everything had been put on hold so staff could sort out another urgent priority instead. Organising Assange's birthday party. ******************************************** Gatz - the play version of Great Gatsby (where the book is read out word for word) ends 15 July. Popbitch is offering GBP 77.50 tickets for GBP 45 for 3 performances only (Fri 6 July, Weds 11 & Fri 13 July). Starts at 2.30pm in the afternoon and runs until 10.30pm the same day – it's an epic commitment but one worth making! http://bit.ly/KVtqoP ******************************************** >> Tabloid agenda << Looking for Britain's good points One red-top editor to staff last weekend: If you're going to the Stone Roses gigs please keep your eyes open for any 'anti social' behaviour from fans.... ...peeing in gardens, pulling up plants, breaking wing mirrors, being sick in the street..... (we've all done it.) Please take a picture on your phone of anything you see and let the newsdesk know. ------------------------------------------------ ASDA has pulled six out of the nine varieties of Alex James's cheeses from their shelves. Sweet chilli and spring onion survived the cut. ------------------------------------------------ >> Furious Lee << How to deal with amateur paps Stewart Lee was drinking in the Cloisters in Salisbury last Saturday when he was accosted by two very drunk men looking to take a picture with him. When Lee declined their request, the boys went ahead and decided to take one anyway - with a very bright flash that gave the game away. Lee then stood up and, pointing at them in turn, said "You're a cunt and you're a cunt". And then stormed out. ------------------------------------------------ Desmond Tutu - so good on things like world peace; esoteric on the badger v baboon question: "Baboons are vicious..." ------------------------------------------------ >> Flower power << And they call this poppy love At this week's unveiling of the Bomber Command Memorial, a Lancaster flew over and dropped poppies all over Green Park. The news showed images of poppies gently fluttering down to earth. What they didn't show was that about 80% of the poppies came down stuck together in two huge lumps and hit the ground with a sizeable force, near the crowd, at a speed that could have killed anyone it hit. Which would have been ironic. ------------------------------------------------ Frankie Dettori has been in Ibiza. He was very friendly to fans, but made sure he stood on a step when in photos with anyone over 6ft. ------------------------------------------------ >> Feather wait << Gilbert hearts Dorian Ticket sales for the Birds Of A Feather live show might not have set the box office alight, but Lesley Joseph seems to be enduringly popular. She has her own personal stalker, Gilbert. He waits by the stage door to request a dinner-date with her and also leaves her a Barbie doll, a good luck card and Haribo Mixtures before each performance. ------------------------------------------------ Eric Sykes was banned from attending Hattie Jacques' funeral. ------------------------------------------------ >> Fishy tales << Rock and roll never dies The rockers of yesteryear... bet they've got some stories to tell, yeah? Here's a selection of the highlights from the recent Facebook updates of Fish from Marillion: * Fish has received a 900 pound bill for two months of electricity after being incorrectly fitted with a 3 phase meter. He's being charged for 5,947 kilowatt hours. * The load on Fish's house has been checked. It comes in at 18.7 amps. * His hot water boiler can only draw 3k according to the element spec, yet it's somehow registering a draw of 6.7k. * EON accidentally put his home phone out of use for an afternoon after putting the call on hold rather than hanging up. * Both Lenny and Ruth from EON are very nice and are doing all they can. ------------------------------------------------ George Entwistle, the new DG of the BBC, is the man who brought Miranda to the BBC1. ------------------------------------------------ >> Popbits << Going mildly retro New records, sounding a bit old: 1. Little Mix - a bit Christina Aguilera 2. Florence ATM - quite Arcade Fire 3. Alex Reid - autotuned Ian Brodie Listen: http://bit.ly/KVrpJt FYI 1: That's not a recommendation for the Alex Reid track. It's truly awful. FYI 2: No Chantelle and Alex in OK this week - did even Richard Desmond baulk at their financial demands? ------------------------------------------------ Ned's Atomic Dustbin, Back to the Planet and Senser are raising their whiffy heads on the niche festival circuit this summer. ------------------------------------------------ >> Blackballed << Lloyd-Webber does a Panorama Why did Jade McEwen come only fifth at Eurovision? According to Andrew Lloyd Webber, it wasn't because the song was poo. (Come, on can you still hum it? Us neither). It was racism. Picking at old wounds, he claims they suffered as Eastern Europeans wouldn't vote for a black artist: "If you're talking about Western Europe - Germany, fine; France, fine; Spain, fine; Greece, fine; Scandinavian countries, fine. But Ukraine? Not so good." That'll be the Ukraine who had black pop superstar Gaitana representing them this year, will it? FYI: Check out the comments: http://bit.ly/O8NxkH ------------------------------------------------ UK has got points from 39 different countries in Eurovision in the last four years, putting a hole in the "Everyone hates us!" theory. ------------------------------------------------ >> Hmms << Gove porn, Quo, tea Jay-Z's 99 Problems and the Fourth Amendment - a legal breakdown: http://bit.ly/Oiou2c An erotic Michael Gove dinosaur story: http://bit.ly/N04VtQ Frankel misses the Coral Eclipse on Saturday... and now so does So You Think. Which makes it a very competitive race - Nathaniel? Twice over e/w? http://bit.ly/MAYyjs That Status Quo movie we mentioned? Here's some pictures from the set: http://bit.ly/N6ootm Lionel Richie teapot: http://bit.ly/M72OlP What Facebook developers liked to listen to at work? Daft Punk's Harder Faster Better Stronger: http://bit.ly/LVoTcg ********************************************* Last chance to come to Popbitch quiz for ages Wed 11 July, 730pm, Century Club W1. Last tables available... All-new quiz rounds and sounds with Tom Webb and Will Barrett plus Des O'Connor related prizes! Email: comp@popbitch.com ********************************************* >> Stuff about Popbitch << * Email us stories, gossip, otter pics: hello@popbitch.com * Subscribe or unsubscribe here: http://www.popbitch.com * Popbitch is published by Popdog Ltd. * Mail by aysabtu ******************************************** Thanks to: charlieboi, JH, HMJ, monstris, fayekorgazm, inthepocket, badhorsey, bitterqueen, JE, G, bobbifleckmann, deep_stoat, whitemaninhammersmithpalais, absoluteshower, lenorman, flobbit ******************************************** Old Jokes Home Higgs Boson goes into a Catholic church. The priest says, "You're not welcome here." Higgs Boson says "You can't have mass without me." Still Bored? One of the best houses in Britain: http://bit.ly/M7LIG1
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