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Popbitch Popquiz // Halloween 2022 Edition
Another eight rounds of tricky Popquiz treats, inc. Heavy Metal or Horror Movie? Crypt-ic Clues, RIPbitch wordsearch and a genuinely horrifying audio round. As a Club Popbitch member, you get it as part of your membership package.
[Download it here] |
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| “To be famous – a stratospheric level of famous – you have to fucking want that shit to happen to you, and you have to do the deal with the devil” – Charli XCX |
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A second serving of scandal and slander Subscribe
Email stories to us club@popbitch.com
* Mistaking Blue for beggars
* Shunted by Simply Red
* PLUS: Big Qs answered |
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| >> Foraging for nuts << |
| Beware the Kwasi handshake |
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On Thursday we asked for stories about celebrity sink dodgers, debtors and PA communicators – and readers delivered. In turn, then…
anon writes:
“Just checking you have Kwasi Kwarteng on your non-hand washing list? When he was a junior minister at BEIS, he was famed for it.
“Personally I was more concerned about his constant testicle fondling (thankfully, over his trousers) in meetings. So much so that a few of us began to worry about his sexual health.” |
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| Taylor Swift has just become the first artist in Billboard history to claim every single Top Ten spot in this week’s Hot 100. |
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| >> Miser Lee << |
| Stars with outstanding debts |
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G writes:
“A bloke came into my husband’s shop in Pimlico once asking for a £1 coin for the parking meter because he had no change. My husband gave him the money and the bloke promised to come back as soon as he’d broken the £20 note he had. My husband said: ‘Fine. See you later, mate.’
“My husband had no idea who the bloke was until he walked out and his assistant said: ‘That’s Lee Ryan. He used to be in Blue.’ Lee Ryan never returned. My husband half-suspected as he handed the coin over that he’d never see it again but the man looked desperate so he took pity on him. He suspected he didn’t have a car either.
“This debt has been outstanding for about 15 years – as the meters are now cashless and rely on payments via phone.” |
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| The second track on the new Blue album that came out last Friday contains the lyrics “If you’re sexy and you know it, clap your hands”. |
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| >> Seeing Red << |
| Hucknall likes the silent type |
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Someone who worked on a Simply Red show overseas got in touch to say that Mr (Don’t Call Him Mick) Hucknall is another celebrity who had his two “people” inform all staff that they were never to address ‘Mr Hucknall’ in person, but only via them – even if he was stood there.
Naturally the set-up resulted in many awkward “Please inform Mr Hucknall that the soup of the day is…”-type scenarios – but it also led to a physical altercation too.
When walking through the backstage corridors, Mick asked how long he had before he was due on. One of the production managers, who momentarily forgot the Hucknall Protocol, began to tell him: “The doors open at…” – but she didn’t get to finish.
Instead, she found herself being shoved through a nearby doorway by the PA standing closest to her. Relations between the two camps were somewhat strained after that. |
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| 7 year old Drew Barrymore once asked the wardrobe crew on the set of ET for a scarf that she could give to ET as she thought the alien was getting cold. |
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| >> Big Answers << |
| Who wants to know? |
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On Thursday we asked: “Which comedian earned themselves the nickname “Clockwork” backstage at Edinburgh this year for their uncanny ability to start crying at precisely 9.17pm every evening?”
The answer was Jayde Adams – and it’s quite a bit nicer than some of the names that those who have previously worked with her have used over the years. Jayde has had a bit of a reputation for directing foul-mouthed rants at her team and once, much against everybody’s advice, thought it would be worth her while to call up a journalist who gave her a 3* review and direct one at them too.
It was no coincidence that around the same time she also had the rare distinction of being dropped by her agent, her PR and her producer all within the space of about a month. |
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| Trick Or Treat News: Robert Elms is currently giving out loose Haribo to those who knock on his door. |
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| >> Means testing << |
| What’s in a name? |
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Years ago, a certain branch of the civil service had an unofficial test that it subjected any briefing document to, to make sure it was written in plain enough English that even ministers of limited intellect could grasp its meaning. It was known back then as the “Amber Rudd Test”.
When Amber Rudd ended up being promoted to Home Secretary, civil servants thought it was improper to let that joke continue about someone who held one of the great offices of state. So they renamed it the ‘Priti Patel Test’ instead. Until she ended being promoted to that same job too.
We don’t know if they renamed it a third time – but news that recurring guest Home Secretary Suella Braverman is now having to take lessons from MI5 in how to use email made us think of it. |
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| OT writes: “I believe I can shed some light on [Thursday’s] Quentin Tarantino story. The reason Mr Tarantino felt so comfortable whooping it up at the cinema is because from the description given I believe it’s the one he owns.” |
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| >> Beeb job << |
| Auntie and the internet |
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We don’t mean to laugh at local BBC services when they’re at risk of suffering big cuts, but we heard a story this afternoon that was so perfectly BBC, we couldn’t help it.
BBC Local was due to have an all-staff internal web briefing at 2pm today about “Digital First”: the reshaping of its local services to better serve online audiences.
Alas, it had to be pushed back half an hour as no-one could get the Zoom to work. |
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| In the UK’s Official Top 300 most-streamed songs of the 70s, 80s and 90s, Wonderwall by Oasis topped the list. |
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| >> Popquiz << |
| This week’s audio rounds |
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Last week saw audio quizzes on the themes of Angels and Devils, Deadly Sins and The Great Boris Comeback. This week, we have five new quizzes for you, featuring 50 more songs that have been chopped up and had their sloppy bits squidged back together in different orders.
You get a point for every song you can identify, plus a further point for every artist/band too. That’s 20 points per round; 100 points per week.
Today’s theme: Halloween
[Play it here] |
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| There’s now over 250 other audio rounds for you to play at the click of a button – so if vaguely spooky music makes you want to be sick, why not pick another? [Play them here] |
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| >> Hmmms << |
| A few quick things |
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Mundane Japanese Halloween 2022
[See on Twitter]
A delightful slice of the old, peaceful internet
[Big Pumpkins]
Tetris with Daft Punk soundtrack
[Robot Tetris]
NewsCorp’s dabbling with betting disasters again…?
[Read on AFR] |
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| Thanks to: bitch_with_the_accent, OT, GB, DS, RM, MM, monstris, bon_marché, S |
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Old Spooky Jokes Home
Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Dishes!
Dishes who?
Dishes the ghost of Sean Connery… |
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