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First PB Quiz of 2014 – at the Roundhouse in Camden! Next Wednesday, 12 March. Only a fiver per person – great deals on food and drink available. AMAZING new quiz rounds – a few tables left bring your colleagues or mates: 30GBP – table for 6, 20GBP – for 4:
http://bit.ly/1favPtW
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“Scientology has given me the tools I need to survive. That’s a fact.” – John Travolta
“Nobody is Superman or Wonder Woman” – Ritchie Neville
POPBITCH _ _ _ _
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|_| |_| 06.03.14 ISSUE 680
Free every week: to subscribe/unsubscribe
go to https://www.popbitch.com
To send stories email: hello@popbitch.com
* Bono – total tool
* New PB iPad mag – finally!
* Charts: Route 94 is new no 1
>> Cat-y Perry <<
Pop star loves her pussy
Is Katy Perry turning into the new Mariah? A make-up artist on a photo shoot with Perry in LA says she wouldn’t get changed for it until some kittens were brought to the studio for her to play with.
Congratulations to S Club Juniors’ Daisy, who has just had a baby with footballer, Jonjo Shelvey. Daisy was a News of the World “Score Angel” glamour model.
>> iPod delusion <<
Bono’s bad at presents
Malala Yousafzai recently made an appearance on the author’s platform at the Emirates Festival of Literature. She recounted that Bono had given her an iPod. Loaded just with U2 tracks.
FYI: Sadly for the Irish band, Malala is a Belieber.
Terry Gilliam is resurrecting his much-failed project, The Man Who Killed Don Quixote, in Fuerteventura, where Ridley Scott just filmed his Moses epic, Exodus.
>> Big Questions <<
Who wants to know what?
Which A-list Brit actor is having a secret affair with a married woman? Hacks are wondering if they will try to make a go of it or if he is just stringing her along.
Seeing as so many of you asked, last week’s Big Question was Simon Pegg.
>> Taking the Michael <<
Don’t always listen to your PRs
A red-top story on taking cocaine seems to have done what a rape trial couldn’t – derail the career of Corrie Kev. But behind the scenes the tabloid can’t quite believe it got the story it did.
Someone at the Sunday Mirror was having a conversation with Michael Le Vell’s ex girlfriend, from whom he split after the trial. She mentioned they wouldn’t be getting back together, blaming booze and drugs. Pricking up their ears, they got her to sign a statement saying he had been taking cocaine.
Armed only with this, the Sunday Mirror approached Le Vell’s people expecting a denial. But Le Vell’s advisers panicked and instead got the client to ‘fess up.
Short term – a bit of money earned in red-top stories. Long term, could it be bye bye 30-year Corrie career?
Martina Cole is the most read author in prison.
>> Picture perfect <<
Garages of the great and good
CT writes:
“I was leaving the famous Grenadier pub in Mayfair last night. The pub is close to Martin Sorrell’s house and, as we left, his garage door opened and a young girl walked out, taking his very nice Red Setter dog for a walk. The light was on in the garage so we sneaked a peak inside.
“Martin has four big pictures on the wall of his garage. All big portraits of himself.”
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>> Popbitch for iPads <<
It’s here! Popbitch: The Magazine is here! Issue One “Tears For Piers” is available in Apple Newsstand now for just GBP 1.99, and you can support its future by subscribing for the year at 25GBP:
* Harry, My Cat Died – 1D fans seem fun
* Franco V Culkin: Who’s the real artist?
* A wine-soaked interview between two of the hacking trial court reporters.
PLUS loads more – check Hmmms for tasters.
http://bit.ly/1bexc8Y
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>> One last bite <<
Farewell, Blunter Edge
A couple of years back we recounted an exchange between Observer food critic Jay Rayner and an octogenarian reader “Blunter Edge” who took Rayner to task on a piece he wrote about slow eaters.
http://bit.ly/1hME43Z
Well, RIP octogenarian slow eater – the painter, Roy Oxlade. Rayner’s sister paper, The Guardian, carried this rather nice obituary of him:
http://bit.ly/1or7Ko4
If you are from San Marino you are a Sammarinese.
>> Get Downes on it <<
Eurovision Round-up
GOOD NEWS: The BBC have stopped sending pensioners to represent us and chosen the voice of Sash’s club hit, Raindrops. You can’t fault singer Molly’s voice, but we’re not quite sure about the 1970s “Power to the People” refrain. The good news is that it’s in Eb minor – close to the most successful Eurovision key.
EVEN BETTER NEWS: Azerbaijan have chosen to send their fabulous Shirley Bassey channelling chef.
EVEN EVEN BETTER NEWS: France voted for hipsters, Moustache.
PREDICTABLE NEWS: San Marino (who’ve been repped by Valentina Monetta for the last two years) have chosen this year’s entry… Valentina Monetta!
NOT SO PREDICTABLE NEWS: Spain picked X Factor’s Ruth Lorenzo.
FISHY NEWS: In Romania’s national final, Vaida scored more votes than the other 11 contestants combined. But when the juries’ vote came in, they lost to the act everyone said would win, previous contestants Paula and Ovi.
Kasper, the spin doctor from Borgen, is presenting Eurovision this year.
>> Millennial old gold <<
Macaulay Culkin and the prawn
When Macaulay Culkin was performing in Madame Melville at London’s Vaudeville Theatre in 2000, he carried a list of foods with him which he was told would keep him looking young.
He used to eat at a Thai restaurant near the theatre, but the only two things on his list which he could order there were broccoli and prawns. So he ate them every night for three weeks.
POPBITCH QUIZ, next Wednesday, Camden:
Buy table for 4 here (there are 5 left) http://bit.ly/1ccn7AK
Other tickets and table sizes http://bit.ly/1favPtW
>> Hmms <<
Goats, Katona, owl
FROM THE POPBITCH MAGAZINE:
Economies Of Mail – Why the mailonline isn’t quite the money-making behemoth we’ve been led to believe:
http://bit.ly/1kAfmHH
Irritable Owl Syndrome – Buy the T shirt here:
http://bit.ly/1cuBQY9
FROM THE POPBITCH MAGAZINE:
Kerry Katona’s Taste In Men – An illustrated guide:
http://bit.ly/1hOFtYm
A work-out for your tongue (clean your screen before use):
http://lickthisapp.com
Pastor basically tells his congregation, “God’s putting it in now”:
http://bit.ly/Nwu4l2
FROM THE POPBITCH MAGAZINE:
Kamaliya – one of Ukraine’s biggest popstars – sends us a dispatch from Kyiv:
http://bit.ly/MPZAJC
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Thanks to: poshduckhunter, SP, LH, CT, DJ, JE, JB, T, Meow, GO, danceswithmustelids
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Old Jokes Home:
A drunk bloke walks past a man repairing a car.
“What’s up?” says the drunk.
“Piston broke”, says the mechanic.
“Ha ha” answers the drunk, “Me too!”