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The Daily Tonic: A Woman Of Loos Virtue

 

Want to learn a new skill in Lockdown 2? Alice Cooper’s guitarist Ryan Roxie is offering a 12 week online guitar course, teaching you how to play like a pro. You can start right now and try the first lesson out for free. Don’t hang around for the rest though, as you can make use of a half-price early bird special: just $49.95 for the full course.
[Get on it here]
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A quick dose of gossip, smut and silliness Subscribe
* Miriam Margolyes’ shag reviews
* Richard Harris’s seat confusion
* PLUS: A Snoop Dogg audio round…
>> XS-ive behaviour <<
Memories of Michael
 

Yesterday was the anniversary of Michael Hutchence’s death. He’s often remembered as quite a tragic and tormented figure, but he enjoyed plenty of happy times too – as a friend who styled him for a famous Helmut Newton shoot remembers.

She was sat with him in the garden of Chateau Marmont when a waitress walked by and pressed her phone number into Michael’s hand. After she’d gone, the friend asked “Michael, don’t you ever get bored of this?”

“Bored of what?” he replied, “Fucking strangers?”

Then, with a laugh, said “You must be kidding? I fucking love it!”

Nominative Determinism of the Day: A lecturer in Health Sciences at the University of East Anglia… Anthony Jermy!
>> Citation needed <<
Question of the day
We talked on Friday about how an uncorrected mistake about Priti Patel attending school with Geri Halliwell has gone on to become a well-known ‘fact’ about the Home Secretary; in part because it wound up trapped in the dangerous media/Wikipedia cycle.Today, we’d like to know about other bizarre claims that have gone uncontested on celebrity Wikipedia entries – especially ones that have accidentally wormed their way into more serious reporting.

Today’s Question: What are the strangest/most dubious bits of celebrity Wikipedia trivia you know of?

Send your strange celeb citations to hello@popbitch.com and we’ll dish out some goodies to the funniest ones.

Happy birthday to Miley Cyrus. Miley says she decided to stop smoking weed when Snoop Dogg told her she smoked more than anyone else he knew.
>> Short temper <<
Ronnie needs a pick-me-up
 

SW writes:
“I worked in the box office at the Prince Edward Theatre during the first year of Mamma Mia! when it was the hottest ticket. The box office window was quite high so one of my colleagues didn’t notice someone who was trying to collect their tickets, as they were too short to see over the counter.

“It turned out it was Ronnie Corbett and he was very, very angry. The language was colourful to say the least.”

DH writes: “I had the pleasure of sitting next to the glorious Miriam Margolyes at a What’s On Stage Awards show many moons ago. She was loud, friendly, farty and funny. I particularly enjoyed her shouting out, as Trevor Nunn thanked his then-wife for her support, that said wife was a ‘damn good shag as well.'”
>> Babs and the basin <<
A woman of loos virtue
 

queen_vic writes:
“I worked in a provincial theatre on the South Coast during a long run of Guys and Dolls starring Barbara Windsor and Christopher Biggins. One of my tasks was to take cups of tea and stuff to Babs’s dressing room between performances on a Saturday afternoon.

“Three weeks into the run I knocked and walked in as usual baring a tray of tea and some toast to find Windsor sitting astride the sink, knickers round her ankles, pissing like a racehorse. ‘Oh, I beg your pardon,’ I stammered in my best Carry-On voice.

“‘Don’t worry darlin’,’ she shrieked. ‘I never use the loos in dressing rooms. You don’t know who’s been there before you.’

AVT writes: “When I was young I worked front of house at a regional theatre. John Lord of Deep Purple / Whitesnake was in for a show and I was tasked with keeping him refreshed. He asked for red wine. I poured him a glass. He took it, and the bottle, said ‘Thank you dear boy’ and off he went.”
>> Quick change <<
Cutting it rather fine
 

The theatre has given us more than its fair share of legendary drinkers and raconteurs – who were often one and the same. To recall that bygone era, here’s an old Richard Harris yarn from the mists of time.

Back in the 80s, Harris was starring in a play at the London Palladium and spent most of his time during the day getting drunk in Soho. One afternoon he got chatting to a beautiful blonde woman. Harris explained to her that he was in a play and that she had to see it. He then got a friend to run round to the theatre and pick up two comp tickets.

Hours later, Harris and the woman were hammered. He reached in to his pocket, found the tickets and took her to the theatre. They took their seats and about 10 minutes in to the play, Harris suddenly stood up, loudly exclaiming “Oh fuck, I’m in this!” and ran off backstage to get changed.

S writes: “When I worked at the London Palladium, Prince Naseem tried to pay for a £2 box of chocolates with a £50 note which I couldn’t change. So his wife came over to pay and told him ‘GO WAIT WITH THE CHILDREN AND DON’T WANDER OFF AGAIN.'”
>> Quarantunes <<
#175: ft. Snoop Dogg
 

In honour of the anniversary of Snoop Dogg’s debut album being released on this day in 1993, today’s audio round is composed of songs by artists who have either worked with, guest featured or been sampled by the Doggfather himself.

Some of these songs feature Snoop, most are more tangentially connected. You get a point for naming the songs you can hear, plus a second point if you can name their lead artist too.

[Ten songs; twenty points]

If you’re wanting a slightly more substantial quiz fix, the Popbitch Popquiz Puzzlebook is filled with quizzes, puzzles and activities designed to be completed in quarantine – and ready to be downloaded…
[It’s yours for a fiver]
>> Hmmms <<
A couple of quick things
 

One of the actors who played Simba in The Lion King recalls the time his trousers fell down on stage
[Read on Instagram]

Celebrity Penis News: Johnny Rotten got a flea bite on his rescuing squirrels
[Read more here]

THANKS TO: KB, CA, L, SW, S, DH, queen_vic, AVT

A QUICK NOTE: We need to take a couple of days off this week (nothing serious) so won’t be about tomorrow – but will be back in time for Thursday.

Old Jokes Home
I had a kids meal in McDonald’s this afternoon.
His mother was furious.

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