“You Know My Name”

To those who are outraged that the Daily Mail has changed beyond recognition under the tenure of new editor Geordie Grieg, we say: show a little patience. He’s already showing signs that he’s becoming more like Dacre.

A Daily Mail recruiter has just posted in a London recruiter Slack group saying that they’re looking to hire someone to come and work for ‘Mr Middle England’ himself.

As a chauffeur. On £35K a year.

The BBC is often accused of bias but fair play to them for making sure that both sides of the Brexit debate were represented in Tuesday’s edition of PM on Radio 4.

The two commentators invited in to discuss the matter?

Katy Balls. And Stephen Bush.

What are they putting in the water in the East Midlands? At last count, we’ve seen two married politicos from the area who have been rather active on Grindr…

Back when he was courting Joanne Beckham, Jermain Defoe was a regular patron of the Blockbuster Video in Tottenham Hale.

Before he came in for the first time, he called ahead to ask if they would close the store to the public while he visited as he didn’t want to be hassled while browsing.

When he took his films up to the counter to rent them, he refused to give out any of the information needed to sign up for an account. When they asked for his name he answered, “You know my name.” And when they asked for his address he told them, “Castlevania” (which they did actually list as his address on the system).

Jermain would always return his own rentals, but not before racking up huge late fees that he would then have to pay off. He often ended up paying to rent what the film would have cost him to buy in the first place.

Noel Edmonds may be better known these days for his belief in positive cosmic energies and cancer-curing electromagnetic pulses – but his long-standing love of pranks has never left him.

At Noel’s chateau in France, there is a lake with an island in the middle of it. Guests who come to stay with him are encouraged to take a trip out to this island on Noel’s little row boat. Unbeknownst to the people who step aboard though, the row boat can also be secretly remote controlled – and Noel keeps ahold of the controls.

Harry Redknapp keeps going on and on about his love for his wife Sandra, but he’s not playing up for the cameras. He’s devoted to her and has been taking her counsel for years.

Back in 2008, while boss at Portsmouth, Harry was offered the Newcastle United job. He was pretty excited about it and told his son Jamie that he was going to accept it. Jamie told some of his footballer mates and they all lumped on it at the bookies.

However, when Harry returned to the south coast he talked it through with Sandra and she wasn’t so sure it was a good idea, so Harry turned the job down the very next morning. Only he hadn’t remembered to tell Jamie, or anyone else, so there were a fair few footballers who were out of pocket with the bookies when then news was announced.

Just before filming began on season three of NBC’s Shades Of Blue, the network announced that they wouldn’t be renewing the show for a fourth season. In retaliation, the show’s star Jennifer Lopez refused to shoot any of the season’s proposed love scenes.

If you’ve been watching the show, you’ll have seen that season three introduced a new character (played by Nick Wechsler) who was clearly intended to be a love interest for Lopez’s character. So you may have wondered why the two characters never got together, despite the obvious growing chemistry between them; or why, when he leaves New York in the season finale, their dialogue is that of a parting couple – even though viewers haven’t seen them so much as kiss.

Well, now you know.

It’s surprising that Richard Madeley ever allowed Judge Jules to compose the music for his Channel 4 show, as apparently Madeley had a very exacting, hands-on approach when it came to the production.

He would often be found making demands of producers and editors that certain clips be cut in specific ways for guests on the show. Whenever he found that they hadn’t done it exactly to his specifications, he would leave the studio mid-rehearsals and run up the stairs to the edit room and oversee the changes being made the way he wanted.

It happened so often that crew had a standard phrase they’d use on the talkback to give each other a heads up: “Madeley’s on his way up – and he’s got his edit cock out.”

After reaching a decent resolution with Bez regarding an unpaid IOU for petrol earlier this year, we’ve been given another celebrity debt collection case.

While watching Ash at Somerset House a few years back, a Popbitch reader was stood in front of Nick Frost and Edgar Wright. Every time our client went to get a fag out, Nick Frost would tap him on the shoulder and ask for one too, promising that he would buy some and repay the favour. Feeling that Frost was a decent sort who would honour his pledge, he freely handed one over every time.

In total, our client reckons Frost cadged about 10 Marlboro Lights throughout the evening, before sneaking backstage before the encore, never making any effort to reimburse him for the fags smoked.

Our reader doesn’t smoke anymore but figures that, at today’s rate, half a pack of Malboros is worth about £6. However, if Nick is willing to cough up £5, our client is prepared to call it quits and move on.

It seems like the “Nail Soup” brand advisors from last week (‘Elton and David’) have made a weird impression on more than just Channel 5.

While doing some other consultancy work for another big brand, they baffled staff there just as much by making a point of screening out any focus group respondent who was in the choir or studied German at school, and they told one guy that they only listened to him because he looked like Mark Ruffalo.

Kittens reenacting The Lion King’s fight scene
[Watch on YouTube]

Grand Theft Otter
[Read on MSN]

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[Shop at Tonic Tribe]

Local news of the week: “Furious Doughnut Lover Blasts New Tesco Recipe”
[See on Somerset Live]

Diego Maradona gives one of the greatest TV football interviews
[Watch on Twitter]

Japanese mascot dance-off
[See on YouTube]

The Jeffrey Epstein affair and Trump’s Labor Secretary
[Read at Miami Herald]

Enjoying Noel on IACGMOOH? Last chance to eat the Dill Or No Dill Burger – ends 2nd Dec, but the retro Noel mural by Joe will live on…
[Eat/See at Lord Nelson Southwark]

Congratulations to Sally, whose name was randomly drawn out of our hat to win tickets to True West and an overnight stay at Blakes.

Still Bored?
Editorial Director of the Hollywood Reporter, Matt Belloni, is this week’s Media Masters podcast guest, talking unwatchable Oscars, unglamorous red carpet reporting and the new “post-Weinstein” Hollywood
[Listen at Media Masters]