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Operation Yewnnopoulos

 

NEW TEXT HERE Charts: Despacito is No 1 again
An Evening of Radical Thinking – the case for free money, a 15-hour working week, and more. An evening with one of Europe’s top young thinkers exploring visionary ideas, like how the Universal Basic Income could be the antidote to inequality and unhappiness. Rutger Bregman, Tues 7 March, London SW1 6.45pm. 10% off, with code POPBITCH:
http://bit.ly/2maIAo4
“I’d always want sausage rather than fish” – Tom Daley
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* Sweden’s Saturday Swearfest
* Pet Shop Boys remixed by NME
* Charts: Ed Sheeran still No. 1
>> Sky and retiring <<
Another news cycle for Brad
 

Once Britain’s favourite sportsman, Bradley Wiggins’ reputation has taken a bit of a dent since we learned about those TUEs, the mystery jiffy bag and the aborted appearance on downmarket reality show, The Jump.

Thankfully it isn’t stopping him from landing some primo gigs. Just before Christmas, Google booked out all of Soho Farm House for their top execs – and invited Bradley to join them.

To teach a spin-class.

Did Caroline Flack make it to the Brits last night? Last we saw, she was wandering around Canary Wharf asking for directions to the O2.
>> A star is born <<
Pet Shop Boys get NME remix
 

When Pet Shop Boys released their latest album, Super, it got a tiny 27-word write up in the NME. The mediocre 3 star review told us little more than the album “confirms their love of pop anthems”.

Which wasn’t that surprising. PSB were never really a band associated with the NME.

Then, in February, it was announced they’d be turning up at the NME Awards to get a “Godlike Genius” award.

NME’s website encouraged us to “revisit our review of their latest album, Super”.

Which now has 348 words. And 4 stars.

Tiger Woods sometimes checks into hotels as Logan Howlett, the human name of comic-book hero Wolverine.
>> Big Questions <<
What people are asking?
 

Which Game of Thrones cast members have let fame go to their heads so far that they demanded 500 grand each for a two-day advertising shoot this month? Unsurprisingly, the brand decided to pass and recast.

America’s Conservative Action Conference may have rejected Milo but the talk “If Heaven Has A Gate, A Wall And Extreme Vetting, Why Can’t America?” is still on.
>> Service charge <<
Gordon’s high stakes gamble
 

Popbitch readers may remember the old CEO of Gordon Ramsay’s restaurants (his father-in-law, Chris Hutcheson). He was the one who took a superinjunction out against us to stop us from making jokes about his secret second family.

Looks like we haven’t heard the last of him, as Hutcheson and three of his children are up in court next month – for allegedly hacking Gordon’s emails.

We can’t imagine the case is going to be too pretty. The two of them were practically joined at the hip back in the day, so Chris knows pretty much everything about Gordon.

The two of them used to go on “fact-finding” trips around the world together. Colleagues remember hearing stories about the “exceptional service” the two men enjoyed from staff on their long-haul flights – and that’s just the PG gossip they were happy to talk about around the office.

FYI: Spare a thought for David Beckham. Another one of his best mates with hacked emails! Still, probably nothing to worry about, eh Dave?

The NYPD has revised the costs of securing Trump Tower and the Trumps down to just $50-60m in 2017.
>> F for effort <<
Sweden’s Saturday swearfest
 

Donald Trump was shocked at what was happening last week in Sweden – and he wasn’t the only one. Melodifestivalen, the family-friendly contest to pick the Swedish Eurovision entry, has become a filthy swearfest!

40% of Sweden tuned in to watch what the hosts decided to call “Melodifuckenfestivalen”. Live on stage. On prime time TV.

As for the songs, Lisa Ajax entered “I Don’t Give A… (Fuck)”, and Robin Bengtssen’s lyrics featured no fewer than nine fuckings.

You’ll be glad to know that the favourite to win isn’t a potty-mouth. He’s called Nano Omar, spent his teen years in a foster home and ended up in prison.

Fox News will be pleased!

Popbitch’s favourite Stockholm restaurant? Rolfs Kok. (Did you see what we did there?)
>> Black and white <<
Brit Award mathematics
 

The Brit Awards have been criticised for failing to reflect the diversity in the UK’s music scene.

Four of the five nominees for Best Male Artist were black.

So they give it to the one white guy. Even though he’s been dead for the whole year.

Nice work!

Today’s headlines: “Sony Music dominate BRIT Awards”. Totally coincidentally, the new boss of the Awards also runs Sony Music!
>> Tennant’s extra <<
Portrait of the artist
 

The poster for David Tennant’s new West End play Don Juan in Soho might look familiar. That’s because, despite the production holding a high-end professional shoot, the photo on the poster is an old one. It was taken six years ago and has since been published in dozens of magazine articles, used as the promo pic for a number of previous work projects, and serves as his Spotlight portrait photo too.

Why does everyone seem so keen to use it? If you ever hire Tennant, you’ll find out. Producers are gently encouraged to use the photo – which was taken by one Georgia Moffett, a.k.a. Mrs Tennant.

See:
http://bit.ly/2l3UCKX

Hot new drink in London bars: the “Craig David”. A shot of tequila with a shot of pineapple juice. (Apparently it’s Craig’s favourite)
>> French toast <<
Applauding Benzema
 

Sex-tape blackmail, hiring an underage prostitute, driving bans for speeding: whenever Karim Benzema makes the press, it’s usually for less-than-wholesome reasons.

So when his name showed up in Football Leaks for his finances no-one was all that surprised. Until they saw why.

It turns out Benzema refused Real Madrid’s usual tax lawyers. He didn’t set up his image rights company offshore so he could pay only 5% tax, like most of his foreign peers (i.e. using the Beckham Law). Instead he set up a company in his home town of Lyon, France. Where company tax is 33%.

Rag’n’Bone Man is from Uckfield, East Sussex. Formerly famous as the last place Lord Lucan was seen.
>> Pissy Paws 4 <<
Elm’s got Wallis disease
 

TM writes:
“I was in the gents nearest BBC Radio London’s studio. Robert Elms entered and not only did he not wash his hands after, he spat in the urinal before weeing.”

Vintage Hollywood pissy-paws? Champion swimmer Esther Williams. How ironic.
>> Brotherly love <<
Neymar’s criminal behaviour
 

Barcelona’s on-pitch collapse isn’t their only bad news this month. Neymar’s just lost his appeal over corruption charges and will have to stand trial. If found guilty he’s likely to get a two-year sentence, but he won’t go to jail (in Spain first offenders get any sentence up to two years suspended).

This might change, however, if the judge catches sight of his tattoos. Neymar has a huge inking of his sister’s face on his arm. (And she has a matching one of his eyes.)

Which is surely criminal.

Neymar case explained:
http://bit.ly/2lyzGgJ

Listen to this week’s Media Focus podcast, with Caroline Norbury, CEO of Creative England:
http://bit.ly/2l2RO0h
>> Hmmms <<
Cats, Trumps, tractors
 

Draw a cat by hand and this program creates it:
http://bit.ly/2lODIEv

Tiny Trumps:
http://bit.ly/2lIPMGW

Some interesting Brexit analysis by Prof Curtice:
http://bit.ly/2moocfe

Pornhub comments on stock photos:
http://bit.ly/1bexdd7

Local news of the week:
http://bit.ly/2maIooM

Issue 32 of Popbitch Magazine is out tomorrow; last call for Issue 31:
http://bit.ly/2lP5kZZ

Thanks to: VB, PD, Craves, B89, NB, party_b, monstris, TP, TW, A, GO, SM,
Old Jokes Home:
Q/ What do you call a North Korean assassin?
A/ Kim Ree-Per

Still Bored?
Stevie Wonder advertising Atari:
http://imgur.com/0QTs0nY

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