The trailer for the ill-fated Queen biopic Bohemian Rhapsody has finally been released, and it seems that Sacha Baron Cohen was right all along. The extravagant, debauched and unapologetically queer elements of Freddie Mercury’s life (and death) are being glossed over in favour of concentrating on the rather dreary nuts and bolts of Queen recording their biggest hit.
If they’re sanitising one of the most integral parts of the story, then we’re not holding out much hope that they’re going to include any of our favourite Freddie moments, including:
* The time he threw a party at a restaurant in Soho where most of his guests never actually saw him because he took up residence in the toilets, sucking off anyone who came within thrusting distance.
* The time Michael Jackson invited him to collaborate, only to fire him three songs in when Jacko caught Freddie snorting gak in his bathroom.
* The time he and Kenny Everett dressed Princess Diana up in full aviator gear and snuck her into the Royal Vauxhall Tavern.
* The writing of the song Life Is Real, which began on a flight across America when Freddie was struck by the muse, getting his assistant to write down the original opening line: “Cunt stains on my pillow”.
* If they haven’t cast Elton John and Rod Stewart in cameo roles, playing their respective parts in the supergroup that Freddie once tried to form (“Hair, Nose & Teeth”) then what was even the point of this film?