The Daily Tonic: Hermione’s Wild Years

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* Calling Su Pollard’s agent!

* What’s floating in Trisha’s pool?

* PLUS: Party tricks of the stars!

>> Savile’s secrets <<

Another Yewtree airbrushing

Peter Kay has announced he’s going to be updating his all-star lip-sync of ‘(Is This The Way To) Amarillo?’ for the Children In Need/Comic Relief Big Night In event this Thursday.
We can’t say we blame him for taking the chance to reshoot a video that originally saw him strolling locked in step with Jimmy Savile – but let’s hope he doesn’t throw the baby out with the bathwater.
Sir Jim didn’t just give his time to Kay’s project. He gave his expertise too, acting as a sort of self-appointed mentor. Those working in Granada Studios at the time remember Savile holding forth, treating Kay to a lengthy impromptu lecture. On the secrets of comedy.

Psychic to the stars, Sally Morgan, stocks her lavvy with peach toilet paper.

>> A second plate <<

More celebrity registrations

* Willie Thorne = A147 PRO

* Bonehead = 515AO (for rear view mirrors)

* James Buckley from The Inbetweeners = CL11NGE

* Lawrence Dallaglio = W4SPS

* Chris Tarrant = CHUB 1 (a reference to his love of fishing, you foul beasts)
Also: as many of you told us, Jimmy Tarbuck famously has the reg plate COM1C – but there seems to be some confusion, re: the timeline of possession as Liza was also seen with it fixed to her Mini Metro for a while.

There were a few emails asking about the couple in Chelsea who have ‘2BE’ and ‘NOT 2B’. They’re not thesps. They’re Sally Greene and Robert Bourne, patrons of the Old Vic.

>> Smash and burn <<

Question of the day

Some of you have been apologising for sending in answers to these questions a day or two after they’ve been asked. To be entirely clear: we are ALWAYS glad to hear any weird celebrity stories you have, any time, however tangential the reason. So please feel free to send in whatever stories these questions inspire, whenever. We welcome it all.
Today’s Question: Have you ever accidentally vandalised a celebrity’s possession?
Send your stories of inadvertent destruction to hello@popbitch.com and we’ll dish out some goody bags for the best ones.

Party Tricks Of The Stars #1: Damian Lewis sings a word-perfect version of Minuetto Allegretto by the Wombles.

>> Phone sex <<

Your agent’s on line Su

Less of a party trick, more a bit of schtick, one of Su Pollard’s favourite things to do to entertain fellow cast members and rouse morale in rehearsals is to pretend to take phone calls on her tits.
She speaks into one, uses the other as a receiver and generally ‘calls’ her agent.

Party Tricks Of The Stars #2: Carla Bruni can move her tits individually and does a performance to music with them after a few drinks.

>> Party poopers <<

Hermione’s wild years

T writes:

“I used to work on the Trisha Show at Anglia TV. Trisha had a fancy dress party for her birthday at her house and the whole office went dressed as the kids from Harry Potter. One of the producers (dressed as Hermione) ended up romping in her swimming pool with one of the waitresses.
“The next day Trisha had the pool drained. She never had another party at her house.”
Have you ever ruined a famous person’s party? hello@popbitch.com

John Barrowman’s best party trick? Cutting slices of birthday cake for his guests. With his knob.

>> Quarantunes <<

Ready for another week of this?

For the first time in 33 audio rounds, we’re afraid this one has to come with an NSFW warning (although seeing as almost everyone is either working from home or not working at all at the minute, we figured it wouldn’t be a massive problem…)
Ten songs, twenty points. Some swearing at the start c/o Quentin Tarantino.
[Play it here]

POPBITCH POPQUIZZES: Need something to spice up your Zoom meetings? Got a staff social you’re supposed to be organising? Are you a particularly keen fan of Blazin’ Squad? Whatever your reason, there’s a downloadable Popbitch Popquiz package to suit your needs…

[Take a look!]

>> Hmmms <<

A couple of quick things

Interesting quiz: can you guess the album cover from the extremely lo-res picture?

[Play on Twitter]
PPE in the Philippines: safe and stylish…

[That’s what we need]
Pope Simulator: you decide who gets blessed

[Coming soon]

Thanks to: AM, MOC, ES, CG, TM, ML, GR, D, CF, DG, TC, PH, monstris

Old Jokes Home

Q/ Why does Snoop Dogg always carry an umbrella?

A/ Fo’ drizzle

Fancy Another?