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Pumped For Information

 

A Radiohead retrospective, Philip Green’s latest fiasco, Charts: Despacito is No 1 again
The next Popbitch Popquiz at Smiths of Smithfield, Tuesday 13th June: ON SALE NOW. Trivia, music and the filthiest arts and crafts round in London. £15 prosecco bottles all night. Bring your friends/colleagues! £5 each, book here.
“To deliver Brexit, you have to believe in Brexit” – Theresa May

“Do you believe in fairies? If you believe, clap your hands. Don’t let Tinker die” – Peter Pan

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* A Radiohead retrospective
* Philip Green’s latest fiasco
* Charts: Despacito is No 1 again
>> Fruit shoot <<
The glamour of gambling
 

When you think of Premier League footballers gambling, you probably think of VIP tables behind red velvet ropes, glamorous ladies draped in diamonds, giggling and pouting while the lads throw down five-figure wagers. The reality is usually a little different.

A big European bookmakers told us that one of their most enthusiastic customers is recent Dutch league winner and former Liverpool striker, Dirk Kuyt.

His game of choice? Online fruit machines.

UKIP’s Paul Nuttall is younger than Tina from S Club 7.
>> Who’s next? <<
Cast list getting shorter
 

Pearl Mackie has been hugely popular with fans as the Doctor’s new sidekick on Doctor Who, but behind the scenes? Not so much.

Perhaps she’s too focused on delivering a good performance on screen, but Pearl just seems to forget her manners on set. Her behaviour was described by various members of the cast and crew as ranging from “grossly rude” to “eye-wateringly rude” – and she also spent a fair bit of time giving unrequested lectures on acting to the Doctor himself, Peter Capaldi.

Of course, Capaldi won’t have to deal with it any longer as he’s not coming back next series. But if the rumours going around are correct, neither will she.

There have only been three Spanish language number ones in US chart history: La Bamba, Macarena and now Despacito.
>> Big Questions <<
Who’s asking what this week?
 

Which TV heart-throb was pissed enough at a party recently to let slip that he’d shagged his on-screen wife off-screen too?

Theresa May takes her own Earl Grey tea bags around with her.
>> Hot cop <<
Snitched like a ‘kipper
We mentioned last week that someone working in the European Parliament is using the office next door to Nigel Farage’s as a place to take their Grindr hook-ups.We also notice that this week Nigel Farage has become a “person of interest” in the FBI’s ongoing investigation into potential collusion between the Trump campaign and Russia.

The question asks itself: has someone been getting pumped for information?

Popbitch’s favourite Australian ambulance service operations supervisor? Queensland’s Justin Payne!
>> Days of Yorke <<
A look back on nostalgia
Thom Yorke from Radiohead did an interview with Rolling Stone this week to coincide with the 20th anniversary reissue of OK Computer. And what did he have to say about that time in his life?“The whole Britpop thing made me fucking angry. I hated it. It was backwards-looking, and I didn’t want any part of it.”

That’s Thom Yorke, there. Complaining that the mid-to-late-90s music scene was backwards-looking, to promote a reissue of the album he released in the mid-to-late-90s.

After its triumphant win at the 2017 Olivier Awards, Rotterdam returns to London for a strictly limited engagement at The Arts Theatre, London in June and July. Win tickets to this hilarious and touching new comedy about gender, sexuality and being a long way from home.

Q/ Which theatre is Rotterdam going to be playing at?

A/ Email your answer here

>> Election section <<
The hunt for Red old loafer
They say that social media doesn’t help with real-world politics, but that’s not always the case.Members of a northern branch of the Labour party became increasingly frustrated at the sporadic appearances their constituency MP was making at local party meetings, never letting anyone know if he was planning to be there or not.

It was only when they discovered that a “beautiful, plump lass” he was “pals with” kept her Twitter geolocation settings turned on. Every time the party members saw that she was tweeting from their city – lo and behold! – he would be around to turn up to meetings.

And when she was elsewhere, weirdly, so was he…

FYI: It’s not Danczuk, but the seat isn’t a million miles away from Rochdale.

Wheatus have an Instagram account for their dog, Buddy – @teenagedirtbud
>> Market forces <<
Better the devil you know
One week to go until the general election and the polls seem to be all over the place. Can we learn anything more about the state of the campaign from the betting markets? We spoke to @LadPolitics to see what was happening online and in Ladbrokes stores, and they told us something interesting.

Back in the EU referendum, the betting odds favoured Remain because more money had been placed on it, even though a greater number of individual bets were on Leave.

In the US Presidential election, Clinton was favourite because more money was put on her, but many more people were betting on Trump.

In this general election more money has been placed on the Conservatives, but a shitload more bets are on Labour.

It can’t happen, can it? Two is a coincidence but three would be a trend, right?

Can you make sense of the election headlines? Take a look at Ladbrokes’ election markets here.
>> Braun-nosing <<
Scooter’s social stable
How did Ariana Grande manage to pull together such an A-list line-up for her One Love Manchester tribute concert? In part, she can thank her well-connected manager, Scooter Braun, who reps everyone from Justin Bieber to Kanye West.Scooter has a knack for picking pop acts that get along well with each other. Take, for example, the first time he introduced Justin Bieber to The Wanted’s Nathan Sykes and Max George. As soon as they met, the boys all started stripping to compare tattoos.

George lifted up his shirt to reveal one with the song lyrics “We try / We fall / We live another day”.

“Dope,” said Bieber, approvingly. Before pulling up his trousers to show his huge tattoo of Jesus with hands clasped in prayer.

Scooter’s real name is Scott. He calls himself Scooter and wears Disney t-shirts to seem non-threatening. (Sounds a little Yewtree to us…)
>> Down in the Dugout <<
It ain’t easy being Green
If you needed yet another reason never to get into business with Philip Green, here’s a good one.

Football media start-up Dugout got Green on board last year as an investor. Billed as Facebook for Football, a digital platform to connect big football clubs with fans (based on the implausibly weird premise that people support “4.6 clubs around the world”) Dugout has largely failed to score with anyone at all. Traffic, and therefore ad revenue, has stayed low. A couple of clubs claim the company is already looking for another funding round.

With figures out today showing that Premier League football clubs banked a record £3.65bn last season, it seems Sir Shifty has hit upon the only way to lose money on the beautiful game.

Listen to this week’s Media Masters podcast – with Nicky Cox, founder and editor of children’s newspaper First News.
>> Hmmms <<
Hippos, toasties, Trump
A baby hippo is introduced to water“A postmodern version of Radio 4’s Just A Minute… Theresa, you have three minutes to talk without clarity, candour or transparency.”

Terminator 2 x Grand Theft Auto 5

Disrupting the grilled cheese sandwich

Is Poldark’s end nigh?

Second best place to watch Champions League final. Safe standing room left.

The loneliness of Donald Trump

Most commonly misspelled words by state

Thanks to: mediumsmart, AC, QS, PL, Roskomcqueen, MD, T, DB, SW, RK, PM,
Old Jokes Home:
My girlfriend was a huge fan of George Michael. She’s been really down since his death so, to cheer her up, I decided to do a tribute to him.When she went to the toilet, I followed her in and started wanking.

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Best plot points in movie history?

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