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£344,777,591 – that’s how much Britain spent switching off wind turbines & overpaying gas generators so far in 2025. It’ll probably be thousands higher by the time you finish reading Popbitch. If only someone could do something about this…
[Read more on Octopus] |
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| “Purple Rain feels like it opens up some kind of magic. It’s like Ali Baba’s cave just opens up when you sing it” – Natasha Bedingfield |
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| 27.03.25 Free newsletter every Thursday subscribe
Issue #1220 Email stories: hello@popbitch.com
Or WhatsApp us: +44 7923 619540
* Celebrity Cottaging Crisis
* P Diddy’s crawling the walls
* PLUS: More terrible smells |
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| >> Wally-iams << |
| Don’t you know who I think I am? |
| Elton John was at the London Palladium last night, doing a concert with Brandi Carlisle. It’s being filmed for ITV, and unsurprisingly had something of a star-studded audience.When the programme airs next month, don’t be surprised if you see a fair bit of David Walliams, up close and personal, at some deeply unflattering angles…
Walliams was there with Matt Lucas. He was sporting a more distinguished salt-and-pepper look, but the same inimitable way of endearing himself to everyone around.
Pre-gig he was standing in the aisle chatting to Jason Momoa. One of the TV cameramen tried to get down the aisle but found his way blocked by the celebrity luvvies’ chat.
He tapped Walliams on the back and indicated that he needed to get through to the stage. Walliams, in high-diva mode, simply stared back at him before turning back to Momoa and carried on talking without moving.
We’re told the cameraman got his revenge by filming right up in Walliams face for several minutes as the show started. |
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| New Wet Leg single expected next week – the first for three years. |
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| >> Cottage History << |
| Pop culture down the toilet |
| Sad times for celebrity cottaging enthusiasts.Last week we told you that the south-west London public bog, in which Stedman from Five Star unfortunately came into contact with a local police officer while he was washing his genitals post-piss, was no more.
This week, a truly iconic piece of pop culture history went down the toilet.
That restroom in the Will Rogers Memorial Park, Beverly Hills, where George Michael got arrested back in 1998, was destroyed by bulldozers.
Watch it happening. It’s like seeing the Berlin Wall come down…
[Sort of]
FYI: Anyone missing George Michael, try the brilliant Chloe Qisha’s Sex, Drugs and Existential Dread. It’s got a bit of that I Want Your Sex sound (with some Controversy and Sledgehammer thrown in too?)
[Listen] |
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| That Dua Lipa Highway to Hell cover got a lacklustre response from crowds when played in Melbourne last week… presumably nothing to do with AC/DC being from Sydney. |
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| >> Big Questions << |
| Who’s asking what this week? |
| Someone who was drinking next to Andrew Scott and Paul Mescal in a Soho bar said that at some point the conversation turned to co-stars they both knew. When the name of one particular actress came up, Paul turned to Andrew and went, “She’s the one who ate my ass then ghosted me”.But who? |
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| It can’t protect you from accidentally leaking national security info in a Signal chat. But it can help you protect your privacy on the internet. Cyber Ghost VPN encrypts your internet connection, shielding your online activity from prying eyes. Popbitch readers get a special 83% discount, inc 4 months free. Secure your online banking, streaming, work – and group chats. Sorry JD Vance.
[Claim your deal now] |
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| >> No Way Out << |
| Diddy crawling the walls |
| With once-untouchable P Diddy now held at the Metropolitan Detention Centre, no Puffy conspiracy theory is currently too outlandish to be given a hearing.There’s one we could never really get our heads around, but it’s definitely bubbling up again right now.
Diddy’s Manhattan neighbours from his old pad in Chelsea were always convinced he had Tupac’s body entombed at his apartment. “Like Lenin,” according to one neighbour.
(Well, Tupac was very quickly and quietly cremated, and nobody ever saw the body… ) |
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| Sex Pistols guitarist Steve Jones had never even stepped foot into the Royal Albert Hall until Tuesday, when he headlined it. |
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| >> Slim Pickings << |
| Detroit spinning |
| The Detroit feds this week charged one of Eminem’s studio techies with leaking a load of Shady’s unreleased records.Local music insiders say there’s quite a lot that’s newsworthy about the techie in question, Joseph Strange.
At some point in 2018, Joe got really into Bitcoin mining, and by the time he was let go by Shady Records in 2021, he was a crypto cultist convinced that he needed to amass Bitcoin to avoid a complete and imminent collapse of fiat. Like many crypto cultists, he was also a Trump supporter, a subscriber to the manosphere MGTOW cult, with unconventional views on sexual health. Such as advocating for “semen retention”.
A set of beliefs that must have gone down a storm with “Fuck Trump” Marshall Mathers. |
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| ROK writes: “Your spot of Johnny Vegas looking at pottery last week isn’t that odd, given that he obtained a degree in Ceramics when he was plain old Michael Pennington”. |
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| >> Daily Males << |
| Charity begins at home |
| In fairness, the Mail doesn’t sound like the happiest place on earth to work right now. From endless rounds of redundancies to paying for their own drinks at office happy hour and posting public apologies to celebrities their writers have offended, it’s understandable that staffers need a pick-me-up.But their desperation to find it has reached new heights. This week production staff at the Mail were horrified to catch someone borrowing from a donation box by the beauty desk. Not your typical freebies, these were pamper packages earmarked to be handed out at women’s aid shelters for International Women’s Day earlier this month.
Security had to resort to checking CCTV to get the donations returned. |
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J Mascis from Dinosaur Jr not only lives in Uma Thurman’s Dad’s old house. but it’s on the same street as Black Francis/Frank Black from Pixies.
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>> Gordon’s Alive!
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| And Fergie’s a tonic |
| JC writes:
“I was sat in 1A and the Duchess of York next to me across the aisle in first class on a flight from New York to London. She was lovely, last to board, so I helped get her bags in the overhead locker. We had a chat about gin and she said she loved it – we both like Gordons. But then she only drank water on the plane.
“She smelled absolutely amazing but snored like a trooper.” |
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| Roll With Your Homies at Clueless, The Musical. A modern spin on a total classic from Amy Heckerling. Now on stage at Trafalgar Theatre.
[Tickets here] |
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| >> Anti-Heroes << |
| Playing with his cock out |
| Swedish Eurovision royalty Mans Zelmerlow had quite the week. Favourite to win the national contest, he could only come second to a comic song about saunas. A misfortune that was followed by his wife posting a whole load of eye-popping allegations on Insta (“drug abuse, physical and emotional abuse, endless infidelity”), as the couple headed for divorce.
We’d be a little careful if we were Mans. Ex-Hollyoaks actress Ciara Jansen has a pretty scary Dad. David Janson played Gestapo officer Herr Flick in the later episodes of ‘Allo ‘Allo.
FYI: We’ve reported before that Mans’ backstage instructions to his band was “Let’s play like we’ve got our cocks out”. Life imitating art? |
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| Spotted giving his hands a cursory rinse in the men’s toilets of Wetherspoons in Canary Wharf on Monday afternoon: Lee Anderson. He was in the company of a male aide rather than that of the Sun reporter with whom he’s been spending a lot of his time. |
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| >> Zzzzzzzz… << |
| Pedestrian spots of the week |
| Popbitch readers have truly been on yawn safari this week, so we bring you the most boring celebrity spots in so far:- David Mitchell, just walking past a coffee shop in St John’s Wood “doing absolutely nothing interesting at all”
– Julian Rhind Tutt slumming it on a Ryanair flight to Zagreb (he did at least pay for an extra legroom seat).
– Comedian Geoff Norcott looking unmoved by the sandwich selection at St Pancras Station, because Tandoori chicken baguettes were sold out. |
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| Celeb Shoppers: Neil Kinnock in Waitrose on Holloway Road, buying two bottles of champagne, a bunch of flowers and a 24 pack of toilet rolls; Daniel Craig and Rachel Weisz in Whole Foods, where they recommended a very nice Rioja to a Popbitch reader. |
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| >> The Smellagraph << |
| A toxic work environment |
| The Telegraph editorial team have been logging the smells that come up into their office from Victoria station on a spreadsheet that’s been running since January 2024.Bad smells are graded from 1-5, and there’s a hell of a lot of “severe stench” days.
The biggest culprits:
Burnt cheese
Wet Onions
Cabbage and gas “horrendous”
And, if anyone has any ideas what “electronic cheese” smells like pls email us |
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| WiFi Wars Easter Extravaganza at Underbelly Boulevard Soho. WiFi Wars is unique – the whole audience plays along with a smartphone or tablet – for gamers aged 8+
[Find Out More] |
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| Thanks to: Earl of Essex, RK, Basil, SK, DL, CL, SM, NF, TD, RO, SM, GC, T, SH
Back in the early days of the messageboard, one Popbitch editor, the_brief, used the page to announce the birth of his son. Old posters might feel a bit older today to hear that said son has himself just announced his own baby’s birth. Congrats all. |
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| Old Jokes Home
Did you hear Apple has announced that their profits are down? But their turnover is excellent.
Still Bored?
Do you have a London venue Popbitch can use for a party? Bar / club / office social space? Email us – we’ll explain… hello@popbitch.com
*** WhatsApp us some goss on +44 7923 619540. We’re also on Instagram and our DMs are open *** |
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