Tomorrow is Black Friday, but today is a Thursday, when you stay ahead of the curve with some LELO deals on premium pleasure toys, up to 60% off and gifts with purchase. From today Popbitch readers can use the discount code POPBITCHLELO10 for an extra 10% off Black Friday offers. We recommend the Enigma Double Sonic.
[No really, trust us] |
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“I like your little tongue balls”
– Gregg Wallace |
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Free newsletter every Thursday subscribe
#1213 Email stories: hello@popbitch.com
* Confused boyband nostalgia
* Bye-Bye Gregg’n’Groucho?
* PLUS: Allison Pearson’s dirty laundry |
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>> Boohoo House << |
A flop and a flood |
With Blacks shut and Groucho shuttered, London’s private members club class have been forced to flee to the countryside outpost of Soho House. And sadly, there’s no refuge there either.
Those escaping the city to the Oliver Bonas paradise that is Soho Farmhouse found it turned into a bog by Storm Bert. The lake overflowed into the swimming pool; which in turn flooded the gym, changing rooms and restaurant complex.
Then the sewage system became inundated and many visitors woke up too close to some minging brown water.
Lots of very angry minor celebs and media wankers had to consider relocating to civilian hotels nearby. |
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Spotted: David Walliams in club class on a BA flight to Dublin. He was wearing a full leather tracksuit and scrolling through the women’s section of the Stella McCartney website. |
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>> MIA EIC << |
Locked and unloaded |
Loaded: Lads, Mags and Mayhem, the documentary, had a media pre-screening last week.
One person sadly not in attendance among the invited journalists was former editor James Brown.
He’d jetted off to the Caribbean instead of being there for the documentary’s release. Why? people were told he wanted to “avoid the media circus”.
How very 90s. |
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Loaded’s second ever issue asked a bunch of famous people for their favourite crisp flavours, which is how we know Pope John Paul II was a cheese and onion man. |
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>> Big Questions << |
(What’s the story) Morning glory? |
Which Royal had a neat trick he liked to play on his staff?Mornings, when his breakfast-in-bed was due, he thought it was funny to be mid-tug when the waitress brought in his silver platter.
He pretty much always managed to time it perfectly, no sweat. |
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,—–, Forget Black Friday – it’s
/ \ Pink Friday with Octopus!
( @ @ ) They’ve given away a deal a
\ v /
day this week (today 1000s of
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octopus toys, tomorrow a
free
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Greggs brekkie) with freebies
to see you through to 2025. Plus massive
discounts on life-changing, bill-saving
tech like heat pumps, solar and EVs.
Helping you save, not spend!
[Explore Pink Friday] |
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>> Time Will Tell << |
Bernard’s always watching |
One of the joys of London’s private members clubs is the sheer weight of BS you get to overhear.
A Popbitch reader listened in this week to two producer-types talking over lunch about a potential film adaptation of Bernard’s Watch, the kids TV classic.
Apparently Rupert Grint and Georgia Groome might be involved, and they want to ask Ed Sheeran to do a song for it because ‘he’s tweeted about it before, you know’. |
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Suspended referee David Coote is known in his hometown of Newark by the affectionate nickname “Cocaine Coote”. |
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>> Black Marx << |
Hauser and not Wirth it |
Groucho Club, for now at least, is no more. Police shut it down so abruptly on Tuesday that members who showed up for their lunch bookings found stressed reception staff telling them they needed to leave but they couldn’t possibly say why (many ended up at Nandos instead), while the Xmas decorations were only half put up outside.All anyone wants to know is: what happened? It’s not like the club hasn’t been the scene of crimes before.
No-one shut the club when Ewan Venters, Groucho’s ex-CEO, brought George Osborne as his plus one to last year’s Christmas party.
Nor when celebrity sex-pests Armie Hammer and Kevin Spacey dined together this summer.
Which means this time, the “serious crime” which is alleged to have occurred on the premises, is likely serious enough for us not to speculate here, sadly. |
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Isaac Levido, author of the Vote Leave slogan “Get Brexit Done” has just had a daughter called Eunice. As in, EU nice. |
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>> Future Nostalgia << |
A Lee worthy of Ryan |
Boybands get a hard time for being full of dummies, and Lee from 911 is doing that reputation proud.
He told an entertainment journalist recently that he didn’t know what the word “nostalgia” meant. He’d simply never heard it used before. Ever in his life.
So if you’re reading this thinking, “Oh, wow, 911! I remember them!” don’t bother telling Lee because the sentiment will be entirely lost on him. |
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Are you a PR, artist or producer? Would you like Popbitch to see your movie trailer, listen to your playlist, or come to your parties? We would like that too. Email us hello@popbitch.com |
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>> My Daily Mail Hell << |
Allison’s dirty laundry |
Many moons before she won the Perrier Award, Bridget Christie, was a lowly secretary at the Daily Mail for the diarist Nigel Dempster.
In a cost-saving exercise she was also asked to be PA for the paper’s then star columnist, Allison Pearson.
One of the first things Allison asked Bridget to do in her new role was to take a bag of dirty laundry to the dry cleaner. Bridget said no. She was outraged.
Several years later she exposed the hypocrisy of a supposedly feminist columnist asking her to do her dirty laundry became an anecdote in the aptly named Edinburgh stage show: My Daily Mail Hell. |
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Want to read juicy scoops and satisfying long reads about your city? Try the Mill Media newsletters, which now cover London, Manchester, Glasgow, Birmingham, Liverpool and Sheffield.
[Sign up for free] |
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>> Bleak House << |
Will Reach woes never end? |
Another week, another reason for us to spare a thought for the poor hacks at Reach publications.One of their offices in the North West has been without heat in their office for three whole months.
Instead of actually fixing the situation, management installed tens of portable heaters around the news desks. They’ve since suggested they will “build a wall” to isolate the minimal warmth that staff shivering over their keyboards are currently getting.
Unsurprisingly, most people have started WFHing instead, leading to some beggy emails from HQ asking people to please come back to the icy tundra that is a Reach office. |
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You may have seen news reports that Paddy McGuinness was suing Popbitch. As Carter Ruck since confirmed, that’s not true. Popbitch is not being sued, but we also fully accept what we’ve been told by Paddy’s team – that he made no appearance at L’Enclume while on his Children In Need bike ride, and that we got this one more than a bit wrong. |
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>> Call my (News) Agent << |
Seat fillers, standby |
The podcasting boom has given rise to a plethora of live show opportunities for fans to see their favourite podcasters in the flesh, some with sellout runs at places like the 02 and Royal Albert Hall. One such podcast is dipping its toe into that pond for a one-off show at a large London venue. But they may have over estimated their mass appeal, as it sounds like fans are not quite ready to spend £100+ (on certain tickets) to see their beloved stars opine onstage. We hear management are considering some enterprising ways if they need to get those seats filled. |
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OFCOM reported today that dating apps are seeing user numbers plummet for the first time. In other news, joining a Michael Gove account on Feeld is journalist Stephen Pollard (or impersonator), trying to match with girls 30 years younger. |
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>> Buttery biscuit base << |
Gregg’s multiple entries |
Mr X writes:
“My friend worked with Gregg Wallace on a project.”All the people on the project team had access to Gregg’s work calendar, on which there were multiple entries to ‘Have sex with wife’.”
“Alas, they were never able to see what the wife’s calendar said.”
FYI: Gregg’s media career was launched by a BBC R4 show called “Veg Talk”. |
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Are you struggling to find a gift for someone who misses the 90s? Check out the new music memoir ‘Three and a Half Minutes of Fame‘ by Alex Boucher. From signing record deals to rubbing shoulders with music legends, Alex’s journey to stardom in the ’90s is a rollercoaster ride of triumphs and tragedies.
[Buy it here] |
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>> Hmmms << |
Otters, bananas, lack of gak |
With a Musical Theatre mega-memory as deep as his vocal range, Le Gateau Chocolat is ready to give it all to you this Christmas. Unlock £15 tickets to Le Gateau Chocolat: Musicals Mayhem at Soho Theatre
[Use code MUSICALS at checkout]
Otters are advancing on central London
[They’ve got to Barking]
Banana duct-taped to a wall makes £6.2 million at auction
[Bargain]
The death of the gakky BNO
[Read on The Guardian]
The weird Harry Kane statue is finally going on display
[Uncanny]
The worst pubs in London
[Read on The Fence]
All the objects forbidden from appearing in Star Wars movies
[Read on Slash] |
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Thanks to: RL, C, JT, MD, SM, CL, PD, W, PM, C, RubbishLogin and every single one of you 118 readers who told us that was a Carom Billiards table, not a pool table, in the Michael Jackson video. You were all very polite about it, when you could have teased us. |
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Old Jokes Home
A man picking through turkeys for his family Thanksgiving meal asked: “Excuse me, do these get any bigger?”The cashier replied, “No sir, they’re dead”.
Still Bored?
Why not WhatsApp us some goss to cure that boredom?
The rat-on-your-mates-and-slebs Popbitch number is: +44 7923 619540. Text us when you’re pissed… |
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