“It was megalolz. I don’t know what everyone is getting freaked out about” – Ian Watkins
POPBITCH _ _ _ _
_ __ ___ _ __ | |__ (_) |_ ___| |__
| ‘_ \ / _ \| ‘_ \| ‘_ \| | __/ __| ‘_ \
| |_) | (_) | |_) | |_) | | || (__| | | |
| .__/ \___/| .__/|_.__/|_|\__\___|_| |_|
|_| |_| 19.12.13 ISSUE 671
Free every week: to subscribe/unsubscribe
go to https://www.popbitch.com
To send stories email: hello@popbitch.com
* A Popbitch present for you all
* Remembering Peter O’Toole
* Charts: X Factor will be number one
>> Christmas gifts <<
A little thank you from us
Back in March, we asked you to support a Kickstarter project to help us raise funds for a special, multimedia iPad spin-off of Popbitch. We met our target and made our pilot edition for our Kickstarters. And – thanks to the generosity of those backers, we are able to bring you all a little Xmas bonus – Popbitch: The Annual 2013.
http://bit.ly/1bexc8Y
It’s free! And full of our favourite stories of the year – plus loads of other exclusive bits and bobs, including:
* Pandas!
* Erotic Godfrey Bloom fan fiction!
* Where’s Nick Cave? – An illustrated puzzle page!
From January, we’re going to publish premium editions fortnightly – and, fingers crossed, offer this on Android too pretty quickly. They’ll feature some great writers and film-making – so if you want to get a year’s subscription at a special price (for you or for your questionable friends), sign up now! We’ve made it this far thanks to our subscribers, it would be great to start 2014 with a bit of cash to spend on some amazing contributors.
And, of course, we have here the usual round-up of the best of the rest. See you in 2014, the newsletter will continue as normal – ie, free and out some time on a Thursday.
******************************************
>> Xmas Presents <<
Buy something nice from us
1. Download the App – you can get a Newsstand subscription for 6 months or 12 months here:
http://bit.ly/1bexc8Y
2. Special Xmas Popbitch Gift Voucher – you and a friend that you nominate can get a subscription to the magazine for 2014 plus an invite to a PB Party!
http://bit.ly/1bScb4a
3. You don’t have an iPad but you’d like something – here’s the “Back To Work” Bundle:
http://bit.ly/1klpBNS
4. You’re full of the Xmas spirit and you just want to donate the PB weasels a glass of plonk:
bit.ly/19eNSTR
******************************************
>> Entourage of the year <<
Put your fruit and flowers in it
We thought Roman Abramovitch was the biggest try-hard, with the dedicated fruit manager he employs aboard his superyacht, but it now seems he has a serious contender in Oprah Winfrey.
When she came over to London to do publicity for her film, The Butler, one of the members of the entourage she brought with her went by the job title “Shoe Changer”.
Term of the Year: Chickenhawk. A cute man who likes much younger men. See Dustin Lance Black.
>> Big Questions <<
Who’s been asking what this year?
Showing what Penguin Zac Efron got up to didn’t seem appropriate in the App Store, so you can see it here instead:
http://bit.ly/18Bui2w
And if you want more, we’ve got some excellent ones in our 2013 Annual – available FOR FREE here:
http://bit.ly/1bexc8Y
2013 was the year internet TV didn’t quite take over. YouTube awards – 175k viewers.
>> Interview of the Year <<
A Lively bit of multitasking
New York Magazine’s website, The Cut, has posted an interview with Blake Lively this week. Its opening paragraph is possibly the year’s finest:
“Blake Lively walks into the room, chewing. ‘Hi, I’m Blake.’ With all the talks of her rumored new lifestyle site, it’s appropriate that she’s eating, looking, and smelling beautiful, all at the same time. It’s the very picture of having it all, the Blake Lively way.”
Man of the Year: Tamer Hassan “Never seen anyone pick up women quicker. Popped out for a fag once, came back in with two.”
>> Celebs of the year <<
Together through Thick’n’Thin
David and Victoria Beckham’s lawyers were unimpressed with a photographer who had been taking pictures of their kids’ sports day, claiming it was an invasion of their privacy. The snapper was worried about getting on the wrong side of such a powerful duo, so imagine how pleased they were, when they sat down and watched an E! channel programme that Victoria had put together on their family life, to find that she’d decided to use some of that very set of pictures that he’d taken!
Charles Saatchi was known at Christ College School, Finchley, for carrying a little flick-knife around with him.
>> Left behind <<
Half Marx for Curtis
According to this ‘How Leftie Are You?’ game, if you are 77% leftie, you are as leftie as Adam Curtis. However, Adam Curtis scored only 52%, so he is nowhere near as leftie as Adam Curtis. (He is, in fact, Helen Lewis):
Is this the end for the album launch press blitz and hype? No PR and an unexpected record brought Beyonce record breaking sales – +600,000 in three days.
>> Greylords <<
Popbitch gold
D_S writes:
“A nice O’Toole story from someone who used to drink with him. O’Toole and Richard Harris both fancied the same woman and one night, after some drinking, they decided to surprise her by climbing up the drainpipe to her third storey flat and climbing through the window.
“O’Toole went first and quickly made it up to the window but Harris got caught on the drainpipe about half way up. Unable to go up or down he called for help and O’Toole told him not to worry, he’d get him free right away. He then climbed into the flat, apologised to the young lady, then telephoned the police to alert them about a burglar trying to break in who had caught himself on the drainpipe.”
******************************************
Strictly Come Dancing – the bookies think BBC favourite Susannah will win this weekend, but could it be Abbey or Sophie? Back your hunch with Coral: http://bit.ly/U1G0IN
******************************************
>> Popbits <<
Our favourite things
Quote:
“YOU ARE NOT A GOD DAMN MAN WHORE. YOU ARE A CUPCAKE. JESUS.” – A 1D fan, on GQ’s Harry Styles cover
Joke:
Just got a job playing triangle in a reggae band. It’s pretty easy. I just stand at the back and ting.
Fact:
There is a suburb of Melbourne called Batman. The man responsible for running the police’s media unit? Senior Constable Adam West.
If Hull City’s name is allowed to be changed to Hull Tigers, there will be no English football team with a name where you can’t colour in any of the letters.
>> Hmmms <<
Links, bears, B*Witched
Think Simon Cowell has it all? Read about the ultimate #realityTV music exec:
http://amzn.to/JedGTN
Support the great work that Connection at St Martin’s do for the homeless, even bears:
http://bit.ly/19A78cj
RIP Paul from Bingo Players, who died this week from cancer:
http://bit.ly/1c3ghuL
Our fave youtube song of 2013:
bit.ly/1aKnH3V
Remember the fainting goat kittens? Bless their little paws:
http://bit.ly/1i3N9Yj
One more chance to see the Run for Your Wife trailer:
http://bit.ly/VYL16Z
*******************************************
Thanks to: SK, deep stoat, MF, AM, AaMa, SG, tamara_bumpdeay,
*******************************************
Old Jokes Home:
I hate jokes about German sausages.
The really are the wurst!
Old Twitter joke of the week
@ScargillArthur
“Mandela dies as film premier of his life airs. Biggs dies as BBC drama Great Train Robbery airs. I hope there’s no miners strike drama soon?”
Still Bored:
Oh, go on then. One last plug for our FREE 2013 Annual. Merry Christmas!
http://bit.ly/1bexc8Y
