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Drink of the summer – the Chilliback. Tequila shot + habanero juice shot. The Player, Soho, do the best we’ve had: http://www.thplyr.com
Go down and try one, or head to Street Feast, Dalston on Fri/Sat: http://www.streetfeastlondon.com
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“My guilty pleasure is One Direction” – Jamie Redknapp
POPBITCH _ _ _ _
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|_| |_| 22.08.13 ISSUE 654
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go to https://www.popbitch.com
To send stories email: hello@popbitch.com
* Come from a land down undr
* Cocozza drops the c-bomb
* Charts: Ellie Goulding is no 1
>> Summer madness <<
What the hell happens in August
You take a couple of weeks off in the silly season and think you know what you’re going to be reading about: Princess Di murdered, Bongo Bongo Land, Maddie – par for the course. But this year just look at how silly it’s got:
* The Guardian suddenly realise their support for state oversight of press means it applies to them as well as Murdoch
* The most vocal anti-Leveson/free press advocates change their tune as soon as it means the lefties get a taste of their own medicine
* Tories and Lib Dems who used to squeal about how anti-terror laws could be misused, now misuse them
* Labour politicians who brought the laws in now complain that they’re used
* And to cap it all everyone’s trying to come to terms with the news that Simon Cowell actually might like girls after all.
You couldn’t make it up etc…
It’s nice to be back.
will.i.am comes over to London to film The Voice; London sewers host a fatberg the size of a double decker bus – filled with wet wipes. Coincidence…?
>> Men at work <<
Come from land down undr
Qantas sponsored the installation of free wi-fi at Sydney’s Kingsford Smith airport.
Their primary reason for doing so was to collect connection data, in order to identify which big company websites business travellers were logging on to at the airport to help uncover and tap new revenue streams.
By far the biggest use of the bandwidth? Grindr.
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The horse burger returns to the Lord Nelson! Featuring the Only Fools and Horses burger and the My Little Pony: http://www.lordnelsonsouthwark.com/
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>> Frank words <<
Cocozza drops the C-bomb
A&R write:
“My husband and I were travelling home from a party in West Sussex and there was a ruckus on the train back to Brighton. It became apparent that Frankie Cocozza had got involved in a bit of a fight. He ended up sitting with us and explained it was all over some ‘chav cunt’.
“He then apologised to us for his use of the word ‘chav’.”
Film PR stunt of the week: A Belfast Story sent out to film reviewers a box containing a fake nail bomb and a balaclava.
>> Gaye for pay <<
Leave Marvin alone
We know better than anyone that it is legally impossible to defame the dead, but Marvin Gaye’s family seems determined to try.
It’s well known that Marvin Gaye was a troubled soul. A cocaine addict, a womaniser, not shy about roughing up the ladies – but to claim, through his track Got To Give Up, that he was responsible for Robin Thicke’s Blurred Lines?
Have some respect, Gayes.
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MOJO – the first major revival of the play which dazzled London in 1996. Reuniting Jez Butterworth and Ian Rickson (Jerusalem, The River). Starring Brendan Coyle, Rupert Grint, Daniel Mays, Ben Whishaw. Sign up NOW for priority preview tickets ahead of public booking September: http://www.mojotheplay.com
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>> Big Questions <<
What people are asking this week
Which “unlucky in love” celebrity might not be quite as jinxed as the stories suggest. A redtop was offered graphic footage of the star being “pleasured in a jacuzzi at the Playboy mansion”. The tabloid never used the footage… no doubt entirely unrelated to this is that the star can often be found sharing whatever news she’s got with the tabloids.
Congratulations to Ruud Wanck on his promotion to COO of Group M Interaction, and Popbitch’s favourite expert advisor on nuclear power? Dame Susan Elizabeth Ion.
>> Baboon V Badger <<
It’s the Ashes edition
England cricket captain Alistair Cook is the latest to offer his two cents on who would win in an interspecies brawl between a baboon and a badger:
“Baboon is the obvious winner because size matters. But beware the underdog and a badger has a nasty bite.”
(Thanks to SP for posing the question – if you get a chance to ask a star about B V B, email hello@popbitch.com)
Life must be hard for Liz Hurley. These days she can be found posing as her Austin Powers character to promote an insurance website’s cuddly Meerkat toy.
>> Gak v otter <<
We’re going to need a bigger case
It’s been a bad year for smuggling. Obviously the big news is the two girls arrested in Peru for allegedly trying to shift 1.5 million pounds worth of gak. But we’re still hung up on a smuggling case from earlier this year – one that still hasn’t been brought to justice.
In January, Thai officials from the Department of National Parks, Wildlife and Plant Conservation were called to Suvarnabhumi airport, where a suspicious suitcase had been left unattended in the departure lounge. Experts secured the suitcase and opened it to find… 11 baby otters.
British actor Jonathan Cake’s son is called Ignatius. Ignatius Cake. Awesome.
>> BlueRey <<
If there is a God…
Lennon and McCartney… Michael Jackson and Stevie Wonder… Calvin Harris and Rihanna… hopefully soon we’ll be able to add the names Lee Ryan and Lana Del Rey to the list of great collaborations in pop history.
@LeeRyanMusic – Hey @LanaDelRey just want to say hi, don’t know if you’ll see this but one day we will work together because I asked spirit, see you soon 🙂 I’m not saying me and @LanaDelRey are gonna work together now but I know that we will Because I asked for it. Spirit and god do answer xxx
Watch this space…
“Terrorism is bollocks. Just like man made global warming. All bollocks”. (Steve Brookstein is the new Jim Kerr)
>> The blame game <<
Theory behind bizarre claim
Alex Band, lead singer from The Calling, most famous for Wherever You Will Go, claims he was abducted and beaten up by a gang in Michigan last weekend.
Perhaps someone else is as sick as we are of that Charlene Soraia cover?
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Get a whopping 20% off all orders at Dean Morris Cards in August. Just use the discount code aug20 at checkout. Wonderfully funny rude cards and gifts for every occasion. Come and have a bloody good laugh!
http://tinyurl.com/klkcvl
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>> Hmmms <<
Otter, otter, crab
The sweetest dead animals you’ll ever see, Gemma Davis’ exhibition Peace At Last is up at the White Rabbit in Stoke Newington until the 31st…
http://peaceatlastphotography.com/
Jason Orange’s brother has staged The Picture of Dorian Gray in his Greenwich house:
http://www.thealchemicorder.com/
Apparently this otter is carrying worms. They look like cocks.
http://bit.ly/1dsa4II
Hitler dolls – with realistic ‘zieg heil!’ action:
http://bit.ly/19Krvp5
This year’s Edinburgh top joke seems to be quite an old one, here’s the excellent Robin Flavell in stand up earlier this year:
http://youtu.be/FrYKwpve0_g
Adam Curtis puts the spying scandal into persective. But is that a hamster or a gerbil?
http://bbc.in/185BluJ
Red Bull heir not so good behind wheel of fast car:
http://bit.ly/12s5JRa
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Thanks to: SP, mount_st_nobody, monstris, SK, deep_stoat, KP, TB, PR, R&A, RAFB, AM, SW, monstris, LMES, mountstnobody,
* Everyone who emailed us about Mr Wanke
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Old Jokes Home:
I’m trying to sell all my old dogging equipment on eBay.
Not had any bids but there’s loads of people watching.
Still Bored:
Tears For Fears think reciprocal cross generational love is in order:
http://bit.ly/17MKd9J
