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The Daily Tonic: Swedehearts

 

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A quick dose of gossip, smut and silliness Subscribe
* Sending coursework to Pulp!
* Roxette and the postwoman!
* PLUS: Your 75th audio round…
>> Paxmean <<
Primary school challenge
 

Back when we started this daily edition, we promised we’d reveal a few answers to some of the Big Questions we’d posed over the years. Hearing all your stories of writing to celebs reminded us of one.

About ten years ago, a primary school class sent off letters to celebrities with a picture of a lifeboat which they asked the stars to colour in. As the days went on, pupils started to get letters back, which they all opened in class. Paul O’Grady sent the picture back featuring his dog, Buster, and David Tennant’s was particularly good too. But which Newsnight presenter caused one little girl to cry?

As she opened the envelope, her letter and lifeboat picture fell out. Untouched and uncoloured, with nothing else.

(Answer: it was Jeremy Paxman.)

The kid probably got off lightly as Paxman has form with written messages. A woman who once interviewed him at the Emirates Festival of Literature asked him to sign a book for her husband. Paxman’s inscription? “All the best for the future with your annoying wife”.
>> School daze <<
Question of the day
 

Thank you very much for all your stories of celebrity correspondence. There was a secondary theme threaded through some of them that we found quite interesting, so we’re going to follow that up today.

Today’s Question: Has a celebrity ever helped you out with a project? School, university, charity, community, some sort of surprise for a friend, etc. Whatever the project, we want to know.

Tell us about the stars who lent you a hand at hello@popbitch.com and we’ll send a goody bag to our favourite ones.

NE writes: “In 1994 Gary Barlow broke my heart. I sent him both my A-level music compositions and he didn’t even reply. I was and still am gutted.”
>> Pulp fiction <<
Lessons in lakes from Russell
 

Cressida1979 writes:
“It was the mid-90s, I was 16 and heavily into Britpop – especially the band Pulp. I was also an aspiring guitarist. I decided to write to the lead guitarist from Pulp, Russell Senior. On paper, with a pen, posted with an actual stamp to the Pulp fan club address. I told him about my hopes to form an indie band and also about the A-levels I was studying for.

“He sent an encouraging response with some chords he’d written for me to try out and some musings on his own geography A-level, including a drawing of an oxbow lake. What a lovely bloke.”

LB writes: “I’ve been a huge Pulp fan for years and I made a model of Jarvis Cocker’s head for my GCSE art exam in 1997. I sent him a picture and he sent me it back signed ‘I’m just a dummy. Love Jarvis.'”
>> Swedehearts <<
Postal Service x Roxette
 

JC writes:
“When I was around 8 years old my best friend and I wrote a letter addressed to ‘Our Postman’ on the street in Stockholm where we were living. We said a few things about ourselves, probably along the lines of ‘We love ice cream, crisps and our favourite band is Roxette’.

“A few weeks later we get a lovely reply from the postwoman and a signed picture of Roxette! Turns out her brother was their sound guy (or something like that) and she had called in a favour for us. The signatures were in biro and we thought you couldn’t see them properly so traced them in with black marker pen, thus ruining it.”

ZG writes: “First celebrity I ever wrote to? The Queen. She replied (via a handmaiden) saying she was enjoying the weather and was sorry my dad had just died.”
>> Ant-agonism <<
No fury like an 8y/o pop fan
 

CP writes:
“I once wrote to Adam Ant when he split from the other ‘Ants’ to exclaim my disgust and disappointment. I expressed a hope that the remaining ‘Ants’ got their revenge on him. I was eight at the time.

“He wrote a very sweet letter back explaining that it was a harmonious split, enclosed a signed photo and hoped I liked his new solo single, Goodie Two Shoes. I didn’t.”

DJ writes: “I once wrote to Henry Rollins back in the early 90s. He sent back a catalogue for his publishing company.”
>> Quarantunes <<
Your 75th audio round
 

If you thought your AirMiles were turning out to be worthless, that’s nothing compared the Popbitch Audio Round points you’ve been accruing. 75 rounds means a potential total of 1,500 points (more if you played the bonus Will Smith sample quiz) all amounting to nothing.

Still, we push on.

You get a point for identifying each song, a point for identifying each artist. There’s ten songs; twenty points – and, this time, all the answers are questions.

[Audio Round #75]

If you weren’t able to make the UK protests today but still want to show support, you can donate to Black Lives Matter [here] or to Black Minds Matter – a crowdfunding initiative to offer professional mental health services to black people and families at this time [here]
>> Hmmms <<
A couple of quick things
 

Star Wars redubbed with Cardi B doing sound effects
[See on Digg]

Nominative Determinism of the Day: Designing the gardens of Hackney… Jenny Bloom
[See here]

Tomorrow’s Popbitch goes out to the main weekly list, so if you’re only subscribed to the daily, fix that now
[Sign up here]

Thanks to: EB, NE, JC, Cressida1979, LB, SW, CP, DJ, ZG
Old Jokes Home
Q/ Why did the chicken cross the road?
A/ For a photo op outside the church

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