#YewToo

“There is a block between me and sense” – Robbie Williams

When Operation Yewtree kicked off in October 2012, a lot of the old guard complained that it would spell the end of society as we know it. That men were no longer going to be able to make flirty jokes at women. That their friendly “hugs” were now going to be misconstrued as something more seedy.They were dead wrong though. For how else do you explain Brian Conley, interviewed in 2015, openly groping his interviewer’s breasts on camera – shortly after telling her that her nipples have gone all hard?

It was a different time back then though, eh?

[Watch here]

You won’t be surprised to learn that the only gossip on everyone’s lips at the annual ad industry wankfest, Cannes Lions, was about Sir Martin Sorrell and the infamous “misuse of company funds” that got him fired from WPP.Top execs were openly scoffing at the idea that being ratted out for being in the wrong house in Shepherd’s Market would be enough to potentially destroy a multi-billion pound business.

But bunga bunga parties at a company apartment in NYC where call girls were flown in to entertain new business prospects? Now THAT was a suggestion that really got people talking…

Which of the England squad is spending so much time playing in online casinos on his iPad that bookies are practically tripping over themselves to offer him a VIP account?

The Guardian Literary Institute claims to be Camp Bestival’s “cerebral sanctum, serving up piping hot brain food with a handsome side of flavourful facts.”

They say they offer talks, Q&As and storytelling, and every morning start the day with topical breakfast sessions with “top editorial talent”.

So who have they hired to headline this year? Noted literary heavyweight… Rick Astley!

We reported a few weeks ago that some of the more old school members of the Royal household didn’t know what to make of the new Duchess of Sussex, so invented the nickname “Meghan The Menace”.

Their eyebrows have been raised further with Ms Markle’s choice of personal aide. Not a tried and trusted Royal adviser or an experienced aristo to help her navigate the choppy waters of royal etiquette, but someone from the celebrity world, whose biggest previous job was working for Madonna.

Buckingham Palace staff are already dining out on a tale of how Meghan’s new girl was calling up big brands and asking for freebies, as if her boss was in the cast of Love Island rather than married to the Queen’s grandson.

Our story last week about Jimmy Bullard trying to plan a sneaky trip to Marbs on the 27th was met with dismay by some in Londons’s ad tech industry, as dozens of them had booked tickets to attend a World Cup event in Covent Garden tonight (the 28th) with a promised appearance by the Banter Governor himself.

You can see why they’d been under that impression though. They were all sent an email that specifically said: “GiveMeSport and Index Exchange invite you to join us for food, drinks, and football at Sway Bar! Join Index Exchange, GiveMeSport and Jimmy Bullard to cheer on England vs Belgium!”

How is Bullard managing this rather tight turnaround? Er… he isn’t. Guests received an updated email three days ago saying “Join Index Exchange, GiveMeSport and Sir Trevor Brooking to cheer on England vs Belgium!”

Getty Images, one of the world’s leading photo agencies, has apologised after it published a gallery of pictures of female football supporters, titled “World Cup 2018: The Sexiest Fans”.

The agency’s chief executive, Dawn Airey, apologised on Channel 4 News saying that the company “[has] done, and will continue to do, much work to promote and create a more evolved and positive depiction of women.”

That’ll be the same Dawn Airey who was previously the chief exec of a fledgling Channel 5; the one who screened Miss World for years and gave the channel its famous “Films, Fucking & Football” strapline, due to the copious amount of late-night softcore grumble it showed.

Looking forward to seeing what she has in mind.

M writes:”In the early 2000s, I was a VIP waiter at the Shadow Lounge. Belinda Carlisle was in, off her face. She went to the loo and left a Gucci scarf in the VIP area.

“I stole it. I am sorry. She was so trashed, she didn’t notice.”

Need to confess to a minor celeb transgression? Email us and absolve your nasty soul hello@popbitch.com

1/ Rolling Stone and Johnny Depp. Best bit?

One of the proudest moments of Depp’s life was when his son Jack started a band.

“Depp asked what they were called. ‘The kid says Clown Boner… we don’t need a paternity test. That’s my kid” says Depp.

[Read on Rolling Stone]

2/ GQ and Donald Trump Jnr. Best bit?

“According to his first wife, Ivana, Donald Trump was never keen on bequeathing his name to anyone… ‘You can’t do that!’ Trump is quoted as saying in Ivana’s memoir, Raising Trump. ‘What if he’s a loser?'”

[Read on GQ]

3/ Now Magazine show how Gemma Collins hasn’t read any of the book “written” by Gemma Collins.

Best bit? All of it

[Read on Now]

Pop culture 20 years ago this month
[Watch on Boing Boing]

Geri’s continuing quest to besmirch George Michael’s memory through song
[Watch on YouTube]

Analysts at JPMorgan apparently began covering WeightWatchers stock this month, with an ‘overweight’ rating.
[Read on FT]

Satanist opens city council meeting
[Watch at WaPo]

Jonathan King’s latest sex assault trial collapsed yesterday
[Read on Daily Mail]

Salford Sexual Health Clinic. It’s like nominative determinism for buildings…
[See on YouTube]

Thanks also to everyone who pointed out that we got our Derricks muddled up last week. Derrick Carter is, of course, a Chicago house legend. It’s Derrick May who is the Detroit techno god. (And particular thanks to subscriber Derrick Carter for being so cool…)

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