Legendary Love Cannon

Remember Michael Owen’s dismally sexless sexting scandal last summer? The one where he was caught begging former Big Brother contestant Rebecca Jane to “fire over” some tit pics for him to assess (tit pics he gave the glowing, Partidge-esque endorsement “Tremendous by the way”…).

She’s now deputy leader of UKIP.

It was telling that one of the first things Matt Hancock asked Sean(n) Walsh when he arrived in the I’m A Celebrity camp was how he got into comedy. Among the many sides of his so-far unseen personality that Hancock is bursting to debut is The Funny Guy.

In fact, Matt claims a sign had to be placed backstage at his Covid briefings during the height of the pandemic reminding him not to crack jokes when speaking to the nation – as he’s usually such a brilliant laugh that gags just come naturally to him.

Which MP ran rings around Matt Hancock in lockdown, managing to juggle not one, not two, but three concurrent affairs (a set-up which came crashing down after it turned out all three of the women knew one another)?

How will Chris Moyles adapt to life in the wild? Probably pretty well on the available evidence.

In the late 90s, just as he was starting to become a big name on Radio 1, Moyles ended up out on the piss one night with Keith Duffy from Boyzone. The two of them piled back to Duffy’s hotel room and Moyles ended up crashing there for the night.

Duffy was not best pleased the next morning to discover that Moyles had shit in his bath.

Olivia Attwood looks set to keep her six figure fee from I’m A Celebrity despite leaving the camp after just 24 hours. She’s getting to be quite a dab hand at this sort of move.

Back in 2018, she and her Love Island partner Chris Hughes announced they’d signed a big contract with bookmakers Coral to be official ambassadors for the year’s horse racing (a deal rumoured to have cost Coral upwards of £100,000).

Within a week, the pair had announced their split and Olivia was already shopping round the story of the truth behind it.

Jul 2022: Nick Cannon announces he’s had a baby (his 8th) with Bre Tiesi: Legendary Love Cannon

Sep 2022: Nick Cannon announces he’s had a baby (his 9th) with LaNisha Cole: Onyx Ice Cole Cannon

Sep 2022: Nick Cannon announces he’s had a baby (his 10th) with Brittany Bell: Rise Messiah Cannon

Oct 2022: Nick Cannon announces he’s expecting a baby (his 11th) with Alyssa Scott

Nov 2022: Nick Cannon announces he’s expecting a baby (his 12th) with Abby De La Rosa

FYI: When Nick Cannon was married to Mariah Carey, he admitted to masturbating to her music – a habit he may want to consider picking back up…

Seeing as it’s only been a few months since we told you about Peter Kay’s infamous car parking clause when playing live, here’s another story about his legendary penny-pinching instead…

anon writes:

“When Peter Kay did his charity song with Susan Boyle, he asked his video director to bring separate DVDs of each camera’s shots around to his house so that he could oversee the edit. At the end of the day, Kay handed the director a carrier bag containing the jewel cases from all the DVDs saying, ‘They’re 20p each and I don’t need them, so take them off of the bill.'”

One final tale from Tarantino’s time in Nottingham. Not only did he get to put on a double bill of John Woo movies at the Broadway Cinema, he also got lucky there.

During a drinks reception event the cinema threw for the celebrated director, guests took it in turns to wander past Screen 2 where some very audible shagging could be heard (accounts vary as to whether it was coming from the projection booth or the lavs).

The woman in question usually preferred to sleep with other women but decided to “try bi” for the night when propositioned by Quentin. Not because she found him especially attractive, but because she didn’t want to pass up the chance to sleep with a Palme d’Or winner.

And given how infrequently women win that award, she figured she’d probably never get a better offer…

Gareth Southgate named his England squad for the World Cup today, with the paps and tabloids all frothing with excitement about how their WAGs and families will be staying on a £1bn cruise ship.

It’s a far cry from the “Golden Generation” England World Cup in Germany where the WAG moniker was first coined. There, England stalwart Jamie Carragher’s relatives were seen at their hotel berating the reception staff because they didn’t have a kettle in their room.

Our recent stories about Jacob Rees-Mogg standing for the National Anthem whenever he hears it have been (by Popbitch standards, at least) relatively wholesome. Unfortunately, that ends here. Someone sent us an old Times Diary story this week and if we had to endure the mental picture it summons, so do you.

Jacob Rees-Mogg is partial to a late night soak in the tub, listening to Radio 4. He tries his best to get himself all rinsed and dried before the end of the Shipping Forecast though because he says he hates having to stand for the anthem dripping wet and nude.

The death of key changes in pop music
[Interesting piece on Tedium]

Heardle Decades have introduced a seasonal Xmas edition
[Play here]

Headline Of The Week: “KFC Apologises For Kristallnacht Chicken Promotion”
[via AFP]

What’s it like to have crap politicians co-opt your band’s music?
[Read on the Guardian]

How much would it cost to get other politicians on I’m A Celeb
[The FT crunches the numbers]

American jets drawing dicks in the sky over Russian bases
[See on Politico]

Local News Of The Week: Colchester Dog Graffiti Edition
[Read on Daily Gazette]

How Qatar hacked the World Cup
[The Bureau investigates]

Paul Weller gives Robert Smith both barrels
[Snippets from an interview]

John Wick 4 trailer is out
[See on YouTube]